" The end of such a happy party is, of
course, all under the table, smiling, but speechless.

Smiling, but beautiful they lay,
A gleam was in their half-closed eye,
But still they murmured with a sigh,
Hic-shelsher-wa'.

Dr. ROBERTS, as quoted by his _confrere_, ROBSON ROOSETEM PASHA,
appears to be a very sensible person. Dr. ROBERTS--he is not Dr.
ARTHUR ROBERTS, we believe--recommends the liqueur to be judiciously
taken at meal-times. And, by the way, as the knowledge of when to
cry, "Hold, enough!" is most useful, here is another test of sobriety
in this very word "judicious," which some, after a couple of glasses
(or more) of fine old cognac, will pronounce as though 'twere spelt
"seducious," and some will swear it ought to be "jusidious." When
nobody can pronounce "judicious" correctly, the _arbiter bibendi_,
if himself absolutely sober as a judge ought to be,--a man quite
"above-board," i.e., not yet under it,--such a one may pronounce that
the guests have had quite enough. It is a pity that so excellent
a writer on temperance should have the singular disadvantage of a
plural name. If, after dinner, a worthy convivialist observed, "I see
ROBERTS," would not the question naturally be, "How many of 'em?"
The Doctor can omit the "s," and, as perhaps he is already a little
singular in his carefully-advanced theories, why should he not
de-pluralise his surname? Do the Doctors R.R. and R. differ on this?
Then we must decide. In the meantime, to show our approval of this
particular article of Dr. ROBSON ROOSTEM PASHA's faith, we, as a
jovial company, drink his health, and then depart for our annual
Alcoholiday trip.

* * * * *

LAWN TENNIS INTELLIGENCE.--BADDELAY has taken the cake.

* * * * *

[Illustration: THINGS ONE WOULD RATHER HAVE EXPRESSED OTHERWISE.

(_Lady Festus At Home_--2 A.M.)

_Hostess._ "ONLY JUST COME, SIR GEORGE? HOW GOOD OF YOU TO COME SO
LATE!"]

* * * * *

OUT OF IT!

(_THE LAY OF THE NON-ELECTED._)

Then a warm-faced functionary read the "Declaration"--when
A sort of sinking sickness took SMITH in the abdomen;
And he smiled a sickly sort of smile, and stalked out at the door,
And the subsequent proceedings interested _him_ no more!

_Bret Harte adapted._

Pheugh! His poll was taken early (it was _not_ on Saturday),
And he lost by seven hundred, and