-lids for grief. It became now not so much a trial for
academical reputation, as for the production of a work, which might be
useful to injured Africa. And keeping this idea in my mind ever after
the perusal of Benezet, I always slept with a candle in my room, that I
might rise out of my bed and put down such thoughts as might occur to me
in the night, if I judged them valuable, conceiving that no arguments of
any moment should be lost in so great a cause. Having at length finished
this painful task, I sent my Essay to the vice-chancellor, and soon
afterwards found myself honoured as before with the first prize.

As it is usual to read these Essays publicly in the senate-house soon
after the prize is adjudged, I was called to Cambridge for this purpose.
I went and performed my office. On returning however to London, the
subject of it almost wholly engrossed my thoughts. I became at times
very seriously affected while upon the road. I stopped my horse
occasionally, and dismounted and walked. I frequently tried to persuade
myself in these intervals that the contents of my Essay could not be
true. The more, however, I reflected upon them, or rather upon the
authorities on which they were founded, the more I gave them credit.
Coming in sight of Wades Mill, in Hertfordshire, I sat down disconsolate
on the turf by the roadside and held my horse. Here a thought came into
my mind, that if the contents of the Essay were true, it was time some
person should see these calamities to their end. Agitated in this
manner, I reached home. This was in the summer of 1785.

In the course of the autumn of the same year I experienced similar
impressions. I walked frequently into the woods, that I might think on
the subject in solitude, and find relief to my mind there. But there the
question still recurred, "Are these things true?" Still the answer
followed as instantaneously "They are." Still the result accompanied it,
"Then surely some person should interfere." I then began to envy those
who had seats in parliament, and who had great riches, and widely
extended connexions, which would enable them to take up this cause.
Finding scarcely any one at that time who thought of it, I was turned
frequently to myself. But here many difficulties arose. It struck me,
among others, that a young man of only twenty-four years of age could
not have that solid judgment or knowledge of men, manners, and things,
which were requisite to qualify him to undert