up stairs after the waiter, and left me to my
meditations.

"This begins to be pleasant," thought I, as the door closed, leaving me
alone in the "salon." In circumstances of such moment, I had never felt
so nonplussed as now, how to decline Kilkee's invitation, without
discovering my intimacy with the Binghams--and yet I could not, by any
possibility, desert them thus abruptly. Such was the dilemma. "I see
but one thing for it," said I, gloomily, as I strode through the
coffee-room, with my head sunk and my hands behind my back--"I see but
one thing left--I must be taken ill to-night, and not be able to leave
my bed in the morning--a fever--a contagious fever--blue and red spots
all over me--and be raving wildly before breakfast time; and if ever
any discovery takes place of my intimacy above stairs, I must only
establish it as a premonitory symptom of insanity, which seized me in
the packet. And now for a doctor that will understand my case, and
listen to reason, as they would call it in Ireland." With this idea
uppermost, I walked out into the court-yard to look for a commissionaire
to guide me in my search. Around on every side of me stood the various
carriages and voitures of the hotel and its inmates, to the full as
distinctive and peculiar in character as their owners. "Ah! there is
Kilkee's," said I, as my eye lighted upon the well-balanced and elegant
little carriage which he had been only with justice encomiumizing. "It
is certainly perfect, and yet I'd give a handful of louis-d'ors it was
like that venerable cabriolet yonder, with the one wheel and no shafts.
But, alas! these springs give little hope of a break down, and that
confounded axle will outlive the patentee. But still, can nothing be
done?--eh? Come, the thought is a good one--I say, garcon, who greases
the wheels of the carriage here?"

"C'est moi, monsieur," said a great oaf, in wooden shoes and a blouse.

"Well, then, do you understand these?" said I, touching the patent
axle-boxes with my cane.

He shook his head.

"Then who does, here?"

"Ah! Michael understands them perfectly."

"Then bring him here," said I.

In a few minutes, a little shrewd old fellow, with a smith's apron, made
his appearance, and introduced himself as M. Michael. I had not much
difficulty in making him master of my plan, which was, to detach one of
the wheels as if for the purpose of oiling the axle, and afterwards
render it incapable of being replaced