t among
us will do the most repulsive things the moment we are smitten with
a Presidential madness. If I had realized that this canvass was to
turn on the candidate's private character I would have started that
Colorado paper sooner. I know the crimes that can be imputed and
proved against me can be told on the fingers of your hands. This
cannot be said of any other Presidential candidate in the field.

Inasmuch as the Blaine-Cleveland campaign was essentially a campaign of
scurrility, this touch was loudly applauded.

Mark Twain voted for Grover Cleveland, though up to the very eve of
election he was ready to support a Republican nominee in whom he had
faith, preferably Edmunds, and he tried to inaugurate a movement by
which Edmunds might be nominated as a surprise candidate and sweep the
country.

It was probably Dr. Burchard's ill-advised utterance concerning the
three alleged R's of Democracy, "Rum, Romanism, and Rebellion," that
defeated Blaine, and by some strange, occult means Mark Twain's butler
George got wind of this damning speech before it became news on
the streets of Hartford. George had gone with his party, and had a
considerable sum of money wagered on Blaine's election; but he knew it
was likely to be very close, and he had an instant and deep conviction
that these three fatal words and Blaine's failure to repudiate them
meant the candidate's downfall. He immediately abandoned everything in
the shape of household duties, and within the briefest possible time had
changed enough money to make him safe, and leave him a good margin of
winnings besides, in the event of Blame's defeat. This was evening.
A very little later the news of Blaine's blunder, announced from the
opera-house stage, was like the explosion of a bomb. But it was no news
to George, who went home rejoicing with his enemies.

CLII. PLATFORMING WITH CABLE

The drain of many investments and the establishment of a publishing
house had told heavily on Clemens's finances. It became desirable to
earn a large sum of money with as much expedition as possible. Authors'
readings had become popular, and Clemens had read in Philadelphia and
Boston with satisfactory results. He now conceived the idea of a grand
tour of authors as a commercial enterprise. He proposed to Aldrich,
Howells, and Cable that he charter a private car for the purpose, and
that with their own housekeeping arrangements, cooking, etc., they could