if I did not catch hold of
some object, I fell heavily on the ground: something resembling a gush
of bile along the duct from the liver caused the same fit to occur at
night, whenever I turned suddenly round.

The Makololo now put the question, "In the event of your death, will
not the white people blame us for having allowed you to go away into
an unhealthy, unknown country of enemies?" I replied that none of my
friends would blame them, because I would leave a book with Sekeletu, to
be sent to Mr. Moffat in case I did not return, which would explain to
him all that had happened until the time of my departure. The book was
a volume of my Journal; and, as I was detained longer than I expected at
Loanda, this book, with a letter, was delivered by Sekeletu to a trader,
and I have been unable to trace it. I regret this now, as it contained
valuable notes on the habits of wild animals, and the request was made
in the letter to convey the volume to my family. The prospect of passing
away from this fair and beautiful world thus came before me in a pretty
plain, matter-of-fact form, and it did seem a serious thing to leave
wife and children--to break up all connection with earth, and enter on
an untried state of existence; and I find myself in my journal pondering
over that fearful migration which lands us in eternity, wondering
whether an angel will soothe the fluttering soul, sadly flurried as it
must be on entering the spirit world, and hoping that Jesus might
speak but one word of peace, for that would establish in the bosom an
everlasting calm. But as I had always believed that, if we serve God
at all, it ought to be done in a manly way, I wrote to my brother,
commending our little girl to his care, as I was determined to "succeed
or perish" in the attempt to open up this part of Africa. The Boers, by
taking possession of all my goods, had saved me the trouble of making
a will; and, considering the light heart now left in my bosom, and some
faint efforts to perform the duty of Christian forgiveness, I felt that
it was better to be the plundered party than one of the plunderers.

When I committed the wagon and remaining goods to the care of the
Makololo, they took all the articles except one box into their huts;
and two warriors, Ponuane and Mahale, brought forward each a fine heifer
calf. After performing a number of warlike evolutions, they asked the
chief to witness the agreement made between them, that whoever of the