it closely. "And the pig jerked the cord in two and went
into the yard and in at the open door and into the room. And what is
moreover also, the pig is an educated show-pig, and its name is
Henry, and--"

"And what?" asked Mr. Guffins eagerly.

"If you want to get rid of the pig out of Mrs. Lippett's house, all
you have to do is to write to the Sheriff of Derling County,
Derlingport, Iowa, and you needn't trouble yourself into it no
further."

"Great Scott!" cried Mr. Guffins. "And you can tell all that from that
piece of cord!"

Mr. Gubb assumed a look of wisdom.

"Us gents that is into the deteckative business," he said carelessly,
"has to learn twelve correspondence lessons before we get our
diplomas. The deteckative mind is educated up to such things."

BURIED BONES

When Mr. Gubb went to the house of Mr. Jonas Medderbrook to pay him
the money he had received for solving the mystery of Henry, the
Educated Pig, he found the house closed, locked and deserted, and on
the door was pinned a card that said simply, and in a neat
handwriting:--

Gone to Patagonia. Will be back in one hundred years. Please
wait.

This was signed "Jonas Medderbrook," but not until the next day did
Mr. Gubb learn from the "Riverbank Eagle" that Mr. Medderbrook had
decamped after selling his friends and neighbors an immense amount of
stock in the Utterly Hopeless Gold-Mine, of which Mr. Gubb had a very
large and entirely worthless quantity.

The departure of Mr. Medderbrook was a great shock to Mr. Gubb, as it
seemed to indicate that serious complications in his wooing of Syrilla
might result from it, especially as he had only heard from Syrilla
through Mr. Medderbrook, but, disturbed as he was by this fear, he was
even more upset by a telegram that came to him direct that afternoon.
It was from Syrilla herself--

Alas! [it read], the worst has happened. Weighed myself this
morning and weighed only one hundred pounds. Later
discovered scales were one hundred and five pounds out of
balance, registering one hundred and five pounds too much. I
cannot marry you, now or ever, Gubby dear, as cannot permit
your faithful heart to wed one who weighs five pounds less
than nothing. Good-bye forever. SYRILLA.

The blow was a severe one to Mr. Gubb, as it would have been to any
lover who loved a half-ton of beauty only to have her shrink to five
pounds less than nothing.