arted, should be glad of this; for meanwhile
the unhappy Bangs has risked exceeding the proverbial allowance of "a
peck of dirt" to be swallowed in a lifetime. Lionel, then, went out,
leaving Tony to deal with the landlord. He sighed with relief, for at
least the most important character had disappeared.

"Mr. Glew," he said winningly, "I have a little surprise for you. May I
close the door for a moment?"

"Cert'n'y, sir," said the other, staring. His bovine gaze followed Tony
as he walked to the fireplace, stooped down, and said gently, "_Come,
birdie, come!_"--a song of his childhood flitting suddenly across his
brain. To make his meaning perfectly clear, he added, "It's all right,
Bangs. You may get down from the table!" Then he discreetly retired a
few paces and waited. He had not to wait long.

"_Mygoard!_" said the landlord explosively, and indeed there was excuse
for the expression. It was caused by the extraordinary entrance of Mr.
Bangs. He clambered down painfully for a few feet, but just as he
reached the bottom his foot slipped and he sat down emphatically, facing
them, in the grate. The appearance of this gnome, silent, save for a
strange wheezing that rasped its way through a soot-slaked windpipe,
baffled description. Tony looked at the figure with a mournful
compassion, and the landlord rocked drunkenly against the door.

"You see, Mr. Glew," said Tony soothingly, "it happened like this. My
friend--who, I am sure, will corroborate me as soon as he has had a
drink,--my friend and I had a dispute about chimneys. He averred that
they often concealed a 'priest's hole,'--one of those hiding-places for
Popish priests we read about. I disagreed, and our dispute became so
heated that we even staked money--Mr. Bangs, on the probable existence
of such a chamber here, I on the negative side. He is an enthusiast, and
nothing would content him but the immediate settlement of the question.
So, despite my protests, up he climbed. Just as he was about to descend,
you and the other gentleman entered. Conceive the position! He naturally
had no wish to be discovered in such a situation, and waited, hoping the
parlor would soon be empty. Your suggestion of the batten upset all
calculations. Now, I am sure you will spare his feelings and say nothing
of this. All he requires is a hot bath. You quite understand?"

The landlord gave a crow of assent. But as he went down the passage a
deep rumbling, suppressed but distinct, b