f the gods? For this
man is ready to do everything that you bid him. But you,
while the man is astounded and evidently elated, having
perceived it, will quickly fleece him to the best of
your power.

[Exit Socrates]

For matters of this sort are somehow accustomed to turn
the other way.

[Enter Strepsiades and Phidippides]

Strep. By Mist, you certainly shall not stay here any
longer! But go and gnaw the columns of Megacles.

Phid. My good sir, what is the matter with you, O
father? You are not in your senses, by Olympian Jupiter!

Strep. See, see, "Olympian Jupiter!" What folly! To
think of your believing in Jupiter, as old as you are!

Phid. Why, pray, did you laugh at this?

Strep. Reflecting that you are a child, and have
antiquated notions. Yet, however, approach, that you may
know more; and I will tell you a thing, by learning
which you will be a man. But see that you do not teach
this to any one.

Phid. Well, what is it?

Strep. You swore now by Jupiter.

Phid. I did.

Strep. Seest thou, then, how good a thing is learning?
There is no Jupiter, O Phidippides!

Phid. Who then?

Strep. Vortex reigns, having expelled Jupiter.

Phid. Bah! Why do you talk foolishly?

Strep. Be assured that it is so.

Phid. Who says this?

Strep. Socrates the Melian, and Chaerephon, who knows
the footmarks of fleas.

Phid. Have you arrived at such a pitch of frenzy that
you believe madmen?

Strep. Speak words of good omen, and say nothing bad of
clever men and wise; of whom, through frugality, none
ever shaved or anointed himself, or went to a bath to
wash himself; while you squander my property in bathing,
as if I were already dead. But go as quickly as possible
and learn instead of me.

Phid. What good could any one learn from them?

Strep. What, really? Whatever wisdom there is among men.
And you will know yourself, how ignorant and stupid you
are. But wait for me here a short time.

[Runs off]

Phid. Ah me! What shall I do, my father being crazed?
Shall I bring him into court and convict him of lunacy,
or shall I give information of his madness to the
coffin-makers?

[Re-enter Strepsiades with a cock under one arm and a
hen under the other]