their own in the basement of the Methodist Church
that I doubt they could find time to come. Besides that, there's the
community choir every Thursday, and the high school music department has
a recital nearly every month. People would drop dead if they had any
more to go to in Clearwater. I'd say our culture is doing pretty good."

"Folk activities are always admirable," said Baker, "but improvement of
the cultural level in any community depends on the injection of outside
influences, and this is one of the functions of the university.
Clearwater College has not performed its obligation to the community in
this respect."

Fenwick appeared to be growing increasingly ruddy. Baker thought he saw
moisture appearing on Fenwick's forehead.

"I know this is difficult to face," said Baker sympathetically, "but I
wanted you to understand, once and for all, just how Clearwater College
appears to the completely objective eye."

Fenwick continued to stare at him without comment. Then he said flatly,
"Let's see some more charts, Bill."

"Museum activities. This is an important function of a college level
institution. Clearwater has no museum."

"We can't afford one, in the first place. In the second place, I think
you've overlooked what we do have."

"There _is_ a Clearwater museum?" Baker asked in surprise.

"Two or three hundred of them, I guess. Every kid in the county has his
own collection of arrowheads, birds' eggs, rocks, and stuffed animals."

"I'm not joking, John," said Baker bleakly. "The museum aspect of the
college is extremely important."

"What else?" said Fenwick.

"I won't go into everything we evaluate. But you should be aware of
several other factors pertaining to the faculty, which are evaluated. We
establish an index of heredity for each faculty member. This is
primarily an index of ancestral achievement."

Fenwick's color deepened. Baker thought it seemed to verge on the
purple. "Should I open the window for a moment?" Baker asked.

Fenwick shook his head, his throat working as if unable to speak. Then
he finally managed to say, "Apart from the sheer idiocy of it, how did
you obtain any information in this area?"

Baker ignored the comment, but answered the question. "You filled out
forms. Each faculty member filled out forms."

"Yeah, that's right. I remember. Acres of forms. None of us minded if it
was to help get the research grant. We supposed it was the usual
Government razzmatazz to keep