farmer was no sooner on his legs, than clapping his hand with
anxious concern into an immense large pocket, he discovered that a
bottle of brandy it contained was crack'd, and the contents beginning to
escape: "I ax pardon, young gentleman," says he, seizing a hat that the
latter held with great care in his hand, and applying it to catch the
liquor--"I ax pardon for making so free, but I see the hat is a little
out of order, and can't be much hurt; and its a pity to waste the
liquor, such a price as it is now-a-days."--"Sir, what do you mean,
shouldn't have thought of your taking such liberties indeed, but makes
good the old saying--impudence and ~12~~ignorance go together: my hat
out of order, hey! I'd have you to know, Sir, that _that there_ hat
was bought of Lloyd, in Newgate-street,{1} only last Thursday,-and cost
eighteen shillings; and if you look at the book in his _vindow_ on
hats, dedicated to the head, you'll find that this here hat is a real
exquisite; so much for what you know about hats, my old fellow--I burst
my stays all to pieces in saving it from being squeezed out of shape,
and now this old brute has made a brandy-bottle of it."--"Oh! oh! my
young Miss in disguise," replied the farmer, "I thought I smelt a
rat when the Captain left the coach, under pretence of walking up the
hill--what, I suppose vou are bound for Gretna, both of vou, hev young
Lady?"

Every thing appertaining to the coach being now righted, our young
friends left the company to adjust their quarrels and pursue their
journey at discretion, anxious to reach the next town as expeditiously
as possible, where they purposed sleeping for the night. They mounted
the tandem, smack went the whip, and in a few minutes the stage-coach
and its motley group had disappeared.

Having reached their destination, and passed the night comfortably, they
next morning determined to kill an hour or two in the town; and were
taking a stroll arm in arm, when perceiving by a playbill, that an
amateur of fashion from the theatres royal, Drury Lane and Haymarket,
was just _come in_, and would shortly _come out_,

1 It would be injustice to great talents, not to notice,
among other important discoveries and improvements of the
age, the labours of Lloyd, who has classified and arranged
whatever relates to that necessary article of personal
elegance, the Hat. He has given the world a volume on the
subject of Hats, dedicated to their