lled a labatory, an'
spent a good part of his time there, mixin' up peculiar stenches. They
used to smell something frightful; but they only exploded about half
the time. No matter what they did do, he always claimed that it was
just exactly what he intended; but his hands was colored up constant
like a fried egg, an' I never took much joy in loafin' about the
woodshed.

That night as soon as I had my dishes washed an' the kitchen red up, we
caught the goat an' took him to the barn. He was considerable of a
goat, this one was, with horns on him a foot long an' a fright of a
temper. He was one o' these fellers what is always out o' humor, only
sometimes farther out than common. Still, me with my rope, an' Ches
with his football habits, was one too many for Mr. Goat; an' we soon
had him up in the haymow. Then I passed up the can o' paint, an' took a
stroll around to see that no one had been givin' us the look-over.

The can o' paint did have a pretty fierce smell, but I didn't put much
faith in it. I'd been in opium joints, an' I knew that a Chinaman would
FATTEN on a smell 'at would suffocate a goat; an' when it comes to
vigorous an' able-bodied odors, a billy-goat ain't no tenderfoot
himself.

After a time Ches came down with a heavenly smile on his face, so I
knew the goat hadn't smothered yet; an' then we went into the house an'
handled the lights in just the regular way; but when the time came,
instead of goin' to bed, we went out an' cooned up a big tree, about on
a level with the mow-window. Ches had nailed up a kind of platform,
which was rickety enough to keep a sensible man on the watch; but first
I knew he was wakin' me up. He had his hand over my mouth, an'
whispered, "He's in the yard now."

I ain't one o' them what yawns an' grunts an' stretches; I wake up like
an antelope--all in a bunch.

The' was a little rustlin' back in some bushes over by the fence. Then,
after a pause, we heard a queer scratchin' noise. He was climbin' up a
tree at the back o' the barn so as to get in through a scuttle in the
roof. 'T was gettin' interestin', an' I got out my guns an' held 'em
ready. Ches had a whole arsenal spread out around him, an' I could easy
see a week's work ahead of me, a-policin' up the premises.

The sky was just literally soggy with stars, an' you could see the
outline of things purty plain. It was one o' those nights when
everything is so still that you hear with the inside of your head, an'
any li