hich I had some regret in my
mind for declining before; so I prepared to see him. I dressed me to
all the advantage possible, I assure you, and for the first time used a
little art; I say for the first time, for I had never yielded to the
baseness of paint before, having always had vanity enough to believe I
had no need of it.

At the hour appointed he came; and as she observed before, so it was
plain still, that he had been drinking, though very far from what we
call being in drink. He appeared exceeding pleased to see me, and
entered into a long discourse with me upon the old affair. I begged
his pardon very often for my share of it, protested I had not any such
design when first I met him, that I had not gone out with him but that
I took him for a very civil gentleman, and that he made me so many
promises of offering no uncivility to me.

He alleged the wine he drank, and that he scarce knew what he did, and
that if it had not been so, I should never have let him take the
freedom with me that he had done. He protested to me that he never
touched any woman but me since he was married to his wife, and it was a
surprise upon him; complimented me upon being so particularly agreeable
to him, and the like; and talked so much of that kind, till I found he
had talked himself almost into a temper to do the same thing over
again. But I took him up short. I protested I had never suffered any
man to touch me since my husband died, which was near eight years. He
said he believed it to be so truly; and added that madam had intimated
as much to him, and that it was his opinion of that part which made his
desire to see me again; and that since he had once broke in upon his
virtue with me, and found no ill consequences, he could be safe in
venturing there again; and so, in short, it went on to what I expected,
and to what will not bear relating.

My old governess had foreseen it, as well as I, and therefore led him
into a room which had not a bed in it, and yet had a chamber within it
which had a bed, whither we withdrew for the rest of the night; and, in
short, after some time being together, he went to bed, and lay there
all night. I withdrew, but came again undressed in the morning, before
it was day, and lay with him the rest of the time.

Thus, you see, having committed a crime once is a sad handle to the
committing of it again; whereas all the regret and reflections wear off
when the temptation renews itself. Had I