e, or
will it not?'

It was my happiness hitherto that I had not discovered myself or my
circumstances at all--no, not so much as my name; and seeing these was
nothing to be expected from him, however good-humoured and however
honest he seemed to be, but to live on what I knew would soon be
wasted, I resolved to conceal everything but the bank bill and the
eleven guineas which I had owned; and I would have been very glad to
have lost that and have been set down where he took me up. I had
indeed another bank bill about me of #30, which was the whole of what I
brought with me, as well to subsist on in the country, as not knowing
what might offer; because this creature, the go-between that had thus
betrayed us both, had made me believe strange things of my marrying to
my advantage in the country, and I was not willing to be without money,
whatever might happen. This bill I concealed, and that made me the
freer of the rest, in consideration of his circumstances, for I really
pitied him heartily.

But to return to his question, I told him I never willingly deceived
him, and I never would. I was very sorry to tell him that the little I
had would not subsist us; that it was not sufficient to subsist me
alone in the south country, and that this was the reason that made me
put myself into the hands of that woman who called him brother, she
having assured me that I might board very handsomely at a town called
Manchester, where I had not yet been, for about #6 a year; and my whole
income not being about #15 a year, I thought I might live easy upon it,
and wait for better things.

He shook his head and remained silent, and a very melancholy evening we
had; however, we supped together, and lay together that night, and when
we had almost supped he looked a little better and more cheerful, and
called for a bottle of wine. 'Come, my dear,' says he, 'though the
case is bad, it is to no purpose to be dejected. Come, be as easy as
you can; I will endeavour to find out some way or other to live; if you
can but subsist yourself, that is better than nothing. I must try the
world again; a man ought to think like a man; to be discouraged is to
yield to the misfortune.' With this he filled a glass and drank to me,
holding my hand and pressing it hard in his hand all the while the wine
went down, and protesting afterwards his main concern was for me.

It was really a true, gallant spirit he was of, and it was the more
grievous to me.