;
and it is fearful to think what a sum any knave as cunning as yourself
had been, would have got out of you. Now, my dear Eusebius, I entreat
you, when you shall read or hear read--"Is thy servant a dog, that he
should do this thing," that you think of Chance, and not of _his doing_,
but _yours_. I dare to say, you have never quite looked at the affair in
this light; we all are apt to wash our hands of a troublesome affair,
and think we come with them clean into court.

Take care you don't resemble the monkey with the meal-tub. His master
thrashed him when he caught him at the theft, and showed him his hands
covered with meal, that he might understand the reason of his
punishment. Monkey, after the next theft, took care to wash his hands,
and when his master came to punish him, extended them to show how clean
they were. His master smiled, and immediately brought him a
looking-glass--his face and whiskers were powdered with meal: and there
you have the origin of the adage, "You have washed your hands but not
your face." There will still be a monitor, Eusebius, to hold the
looking-glass to you, and the like of you: and look to your face; and
whenever you find that you have _put a good face_ upon any doubtful
matter, take the trouble then to look at your hands; and if they be
clean, look again and see if your face and hands are clean together. And
that will be the best _tableau-vivant_ you or any one else can study.

Now, however, that conscience seems so thoroughly gone to the dogs,
without any personal allusion to your case, Eusebius, I cannot resist
telling you an anecdote by which you will see how Neighbour Grace of
M----n ingeniously touched the conscience of Attorney B., who was
supposed to have none--upon the matter of a dog-theft, and how Attorney
B. was a match for Neighbour Grace.

"I am come to thee, Friend B.," said Grace, "to ask thee a question.
Suppose my dog should go into thy kitchen, and run off with a neck of
mutton, dost thee think I ought to pay thee for the neck of mutton?"

"Without doubt," said Lawyer B.

"Then I'd thank thee to pay me three and fourpence; for it was thy dog
stole my neck of mutton, and that's the cost of it."

"Perfectly right," said Attorney B., coolly drawing out a bill and
receipt. "So, Neighbour Grace, you must pay me three and fourpence, and
that settles the matter."

"How so?"

"Why, as you asked my opinion, my charge for that is six and
eightpence--deduct value of