ned if you had not been there?

JEAN

He had _me_? No, he never had me--he _made_ me.... And that's why I sit
all alone with the things that are Paul,--Paul, the flame that was never
lit on the altar, the sword that was never drawn from the scabbard.... We
talk together, Vera. Paul and I. We talk together, and I wait for him to
tell me what to do.

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