my heart for a job. 'Would 'ee like to catch a
Spy--a real German one?' says he. 'Get along with 'ee, pullin' my
leg!' says I. 'I ben't pullin' your leg,' says he. 'I be offerin'
what may turn out to be the chance o' your life, if you're a smart
chap an' want promotion.' 'What is it?' said I. 'Well, I mention no
names,' said he, 'but you live in the same house with Nicholas
Nanjivell.' 'We're turnin' out this week,' said I. 'All the more
reason why you should look slippy an' get to work at once,' says he.
Then I told him, sir," went on 'Bert, gathering confidence from the
sound of his own voice, "that I was fair sick o' plannin' to do Kind
Actions, which was no business of anybody's in War time, and a bad
let-down after coast-watchin'. 'But,' said I,"--here he turned upon
Nicky-Nan--"'if 'tis a Kind Action for Mr Nanjivell, I'd as lief do
it upon him as upon anybody: for you might almost call him one o' the
family,' I said. 'Kind Action?' says he. 'I don't want you to do
him no kinder action than to catch him out for a German spy. I name
no names,' says he, 'but from information received, he's in the
Germans' pay, an' Mrs Polsue is ready to swear to it.'"

Nicky-Nan gripped his walking-staff and stood erect, as if to spring
on Mr Pamphlett. But of a sudden the enormity of the charge seemed
to overcome him, and he passed a hand over his eyes.

"That's the second time," he muttered. "An' me, that--God help me!--
scarce bothered myself about its bein' a War at all: bein' otherwise
worried, as you'd know, sir." His straight appeal to his inveterate
enemy had a dignity more convincing than any violent repudiation.
But Mr Pamphlett waved it aside.

"Let the boy tell his story. . . . Well, boy, and what was your
answer to the constable?"

"I told him," said 'Bert stolidly, "to get along for a silly
fat-head. Didn't I, now?" 'Bert appealed to the recipient of that
compliment to confirm its textual accuracy.

"He did so," corroborated Rat-it-all. "He is right to that extent.
Which it gave me such a poor opinion of the whole Boy Scout movement
that I've treated it thenceforth as dirt beneath my feet. There was
a time when I thought pretty tolerably of Baden-Powell. But when it
comes to fat-heads--"

"But you see, sir," 'Bert went on, "this put me in mind that I'd seen
Rat-it-all for two days past behavin' very silly behind walls an'
fuzz-bushes, an' 'most always in the wake o' Nicky-Nan--of Mr
Nanjive