a frolic. Beside this, I had twenty other little
employments in the family. I was to do many small things without
bidding; to carry the cork screw; to stand godfather to all the butler's
children; to sing when I was bid; to be never out of humour; always to
be humble, and, if I could, to be very happy.

'In this honourable post, however, I was not without a rival. A captain
of marines, who was formed for the place by nature, opposed me in my
patron's affections. His mother had been laundress to a man of quality,
and thus he early acquired a taste for pimping and pedigree. As this
gentleman made it the study of his life to be acquainted with lords,
though he was dismissed from several for his stupidity; yet he
found many of them who were as dull as himself, that permitted his
assiduities. As flattery was his trade, he practised it with the easiest
address imaginable; but it came aukward and stiff from me; and as every
day my patron's desire of flattery encreased, so every hour being better
acquainted with his defects, I became more unwilling to give it. Thus I
was once more fairly going to give up the field to the captain, when my
friend found occasion for my assistance. This was nothing less than to
fight a duel for him, with a gentleman whose sister it was pretended he
had used ill. I readily complied with his request, and tho' I see you
are displeased at my conduct, yet as it was a debt indispensably due
to friendship, I could not refuse. I undertook the affair, disarmed my
antagonist, and soon after had the pleasure of finding that the lady was
only a woman of the town, and the fellow her bully and a sharper. This
piece of service was repaid with the warmest professions of gratitude;
but as my friend was to leave town in a few days, he knew no other
method of serving me, but by recommending me to his uncle Sir William
Thornhill, and another nobleman of great distinction, who enjoyed a post
under the government. When he was gone, my first care was to carry his
recommendatory letter to his uncle, a man whose character for every
virtue was universal, yet just. I was received by his servants with the
most hospitable smiles; for the looks of the domestics ever transmit
their master's benevolence. Being shewn into a grand apartment, where
Sir William soon came to me, I delivered my message and letter, which
he read, and after pausing some minutes, Pray, Sir, cried he, inform me
what you have done for my kinsman, to deserve