away here, and must just wait till I die.

Yours humbly, and most unfortunate,

CARRY.

If it's any good to be sorry, nobody can be more sorry
than me, and nobody more unhappy. I did try to pray when
you was gone, but it only made me more ashamed. If there
was only anywhere to go to, I'd go.

CHAPTER XXIX.

THE BULL AT LORING.

Gilmore had told his friend that he would do two things,--that he
would start off and travel for four or five years, and that he would
pay a visit to Loring. Fenwick had advised him to do neither, but to
stay at home and dig and say his prayers. But in such emergencies
no man takes his friend's advice; and when Mr. Chamberlaine had
left him, Gilmore had made up his mind that he would at any rate go
to Loring. He went to church on the Sunday morning, and was half
resolved to tell Mrs. Fenwick of his purpose; but chance delayed her
in the church, and he sauntered away home without having mentioned
it. He let half the next week pass by without stirring beyond his
own ground. During those three days he changed his mind half a dozen
times; but at last, on the Thursday, he had his portmanteau packed
and started on his journey. As he was preparing to leave the house
he wrote one line to Fenwick in pencil. "I am this moment off to
Loring.--H. G." This he left in the village as he drove through to
the Westbury station.

He had formed no idea in his own mind of any definite purpose in
going. He did not know what he should do or what say when he got to
Loring. He had told himself a hundred times that any persecution of
the girl on his part would be mean and unworthy of him. And he was
also aware that no condition in which a man could place himself was
more open to contempt than that of a whining, pining, unsuccessful
lover. A man is bound to take a woman's decision against him, bear
it as he may, and say as little against it as possible. He is bound
to do so when he is convinced that a woman's decision is final; and
there can be no stronger proof of such finality than the fact that
she has declared a preference for some other man. All this Gilmore
knew, but he would not divest himself of the idea that there might
still be some turn in the wheel of fortune. He had heard a vague
rumour that Captain Marrable, his rival, was a very dangerous man.
His uncle was quite sure that the Captain's father was thoroughly
bad, and had thrown out hints against the son, which Gilmore in