ness. Were they not the sons of Shitan?" replied Mustapha.

"Very true; but, Mustapha, the consequence is that I am in want of a
vizier; and whom do I know equal to that office?"

"While your sublime highness is pacha, is not a child equal to the
office? Who stumbles, when guided by unerring wisdom?"

"I know that very well," replied the pacha; "but if I am always to
direct him, I might as well be vizier myself; besides, I shall have no
one to blame, if affairs go wrong with the sultan. Inshallah! please
the Lord, the vizier's head may sometimes save my own."

"Are we not as dogs before you?" replied Mustapha: "happy the man, who
by offering his own head may preserve that of your sublime highness! It
ought to be the proudest day of his life."

"At all events it would be the last," rejoined the pacha.

"May it please your sublime highness," observed Mustapha, after a pause,
"if your slave may be so honoured as to speak in your presence, a vizier
should be a person of great tact; he should be able to draw the line as
nicely as I do when I shave your sublime head, leaving not a vestige of
the hair, yet entering not upon the skin."

"Very true, Mustapha."

"He should have a sharp eye for the disaffected to the government,
selecting them and removing them from among the crowd, as I do the few
white hairs which presume to make their appearance in your sublime and
magnificent beard."

"Very true, Mustapha."

"He should carefully remove all impurities from the state, as I have
this morning from your sublime ears."

"Very true, Mustapha."

"He should be well acquainted with the secret springs of action, as I
have proved myself to be in the shampooing which your sublime highness
has just received."

"Very true, Mustapha."

"Moreover, he should be ever grateful to your highness for the
distinguished honour conferred upon him."

"All that you say is very true, Mustapha, but where am I to meet with
such a man?"

"This world is convenient in some points," continued Mustapha; "if you
want either a fool or a knave, you have not far to go to find them; but
it is no easy task to select the person you require. I know but one."

"And who is he?"

"One whose head is but as your footstool," answered the barber,
prostrating himself,--"your sublime highness's most devoted slave,
Mustapha."

"Holy Prophet! Then you mean yourself!--Well, now I think of it, if one
barber can become a pacha, I do not see why another