st acquisition. I have it on no
less an authority than his own that he is a very remarkable man. I
gather that he is futurist by inclination, and dyspeptic by nature,
which I take to be a more or less natural sequence of events. At
present he adorns my office, and looks intense."

"He sounds rather like a disease," murmured the Brigade Major. "From
what you say, I gather he considers himself an artist."

"He sculpts, or whatever a sculptor does when he gets busy." The
Colonel smiled gently. "How he ever blew out here I cannot imagine,
but these things will occur. I offended him mortally, I regret to say,
the first day he arrived, by confessing that I had never even heard his
name, much less seen his work, but I think he's forgiven me. I allowed
him to arrange the timber yard to-day more aesthetically, and the
Sergeant-major thinks he is soft in the head, so Bendigo is supremely
happy."

"He sounds a perfect treasure," remarked the Brigadier drily.
"However, as long as he models that tree and we get it up somehow, and
I never see him, I shall be quite happy, old boy."

"It shall be done," answered the C.R.E., "by our little Bendy himself.
A life-size, hollow camouflage stump shall replace the original,
complete with peephole and seat."

Thus lightly was settled the immediate future of one of the world's
great ones. In view, however, of the fact that the world is so often
lamentably ignorant of greatness, it now becomes necessary for me to
carry out my second introduction and enlighten the Philistines as to
what they have missed by their miserable and sordid materialism.

Be it known then that for several years Bendigo Jones had been in the
habit of inflicting upon a long-suffering and inoffensive public a
series of lumps of material. What these lumps were supposed to
represent no one has yet discovered; and I am given to understand that
unless the proud perpetrator noted it himself on completion, he too was
usually unable to elucidate the mystery. It was not of great account,
as he ran not the slightest risk of contradiction whatever he said; and
as no person ever willingly went twice to his exhibitions, he could
vary the title daily without fear of discovery. Another great point
about his work was its many-sidedness. A lump looked at from one side
would perhaps represent "Pelican with young," while on the other "The
Children's Hour, or six o'clock at Mud View Villa," would be depicted.
This, needless