l be."

Again she laughed, for who of her sex is there that does not like to be
called beautiful, especially when she knows that it is meant, and that
whatever her personal shortcomings, to the speaker she is beautiful?
But this time the only answer she attempted was:

"You said you were late, and you are getting later. Run home, there's a
good little boy."

"Why do you laugh at me?" he asked.

"Because I am laughing at myself," she answered, "and you should have
your share."

Then very nearly he kissed her, only he was in such a hurry, also the
willow log, a large one, was between them; possibly she had arranged
that this should be so. So he could only press her hand and depart,
muttering something indistinguishable. She watched him vanish, after
which she sat down again on the log and really did laugh. Still, it was
a queer kind of merriment, for by degrees it turned into little sobs
and tears.

"You little fool, what has happened to you?" she asked herself. "Are
you--are you--and if so, is he--? Oh! nonsense, and yet, something has
happened, for I never felt like this before. I thought it was all
rubbish, mere natural attraction, part of Nature's scheme and so on, as
they write in the clever books. But it's more than that--at least it
would be if I were---- Besides, I'm ages older than he is, although I
was born six months later. I'm a woman full-grown, and he is only a
boy. If he hadn't been a boy he would have taken his advantage when he
must have known that I was weak as water, just for the joy of seeing
him again. Now he has lost his chance, if he wanted one, for by
to-morrow I shall be strong again, and there shall be no more----"

Then she looked at the backs of her hands which she could not see
because of the gathering darkness, and as they were invisible, kissed
them instead, just as though they belonged to someone else. After this
she sat a while brooding and listening to the pulsing of her heart,
which was beating with unusual strength this night. As she did so in
that mysterious hour which sometimes comes to us in English summers, a
great change fell upon her. When she sat down upon that fallen tree she
was still a girl and virginal; when she rose from it she was a
developed, loving woman. It was as though a spirit had visited her and
whispered in her ear. She could almost hear the words. They were:

"Fulfil your fate. Love and be loved with body and with spirit, with
heart and soul and strength.