ce of his wife
bending over them. With a wrench of his chair he arose.

"Patricia!" he said stormily, "did I not say that nothing of his--did I
not--" he paused and gulped. "Uncle Noah," he added unsteadily, "that
turkey of yours is gobbling like a fiend under the window; you--he--"

The Colonel stopped abruptly, reddened as his eyes fell upon the negro
(Uncle Noah had wisely turned away), and sternly reseated himself,
somewhat confused by his thoughtless reference to the late lamented Job,

Uncle Noah hobbled from the room, his brown face working convulsively.
In the kitchen he shook with silent laughter, doubling over
breathlessly and clasping his hands over his stomach in aching distress.

"And what, Uncle Noah," asked the Colonel kindly as the old negro
presently re-entered the dining-room, "have we for our Christmas
breakfast?"

"Well, sah," Uncle Noah began fluently, "we has grapefruit, cereal wif
cream, quail on toast, fried oysters--er--oatmeal, hot muffins, fried
chicken, co'nbread an' coffee!"

The Colonel, appearing to be thoughtfully considering his choice,
replied as usual: "It all sounds delicious, Uncle Noah, but I have a
touch of my old enemy dyspepsia to-day. I think I shall have some
cornbread and coffee, and so will Mrs. Fairfax."

"I doan think you quite understand me, sah," averred Uncle Noah, "an'
sah, I 'spects yoh dyspepsia ain't so bad dis mornin'. We has foh
breakfast, sah, grapefruit, cereal wif cream, quail on toast, fried
oysters--er--_oatmeal, fried chicken, hot muffins, co'nbread an'
coffee_!"

There was no mistaking the emphasis this time. Colonel Fairfax darted
a lightning glance at the negro and amended his selection with a
question in his voice. "Well, now I come to think of it, Uncle Noah,"
he said, "my dyspepsia isn't nearly so bad. I'll have, let me see,
oatmeal--that was in the list, I believe--er--fried chicken--am I
right?--muffins, cornbread and coffee."

There was a conviction in the Colonel's deep voice that something
extraordinary was afoot, and Uncle Noah, flurried by its ominous ring,
hurried from the room. Dimly he had pictured his master's gracious
astonishment and pleasure. Any queries relative to the financial
source of the Christmas delicacies, however, had been lost entirely in
the darky's jubilant excitement. Now he groaned in dismay.

"Yoh is in a mess for sure, Uncle Noah," he apostrophized himself.
"Whut'll yoh do when it come time foh dinnah