other. "And sorry I'd be to think
that Beatrice took after me. I'm commonplace. Mrs. Bertram. I have no
figure to boast of, nor much of a face either. What _he_ saw to
like in me, poor man, has puzzled my brain a score and score of times.
Kind and affectionate he ever was, but he couldn't but own, as own I did
for him, that I was a cut below him. Beatrice features her father, Mrs.
Bertram, both in mind and body."

Mrs. Bertram murmured some compliment about the mother's kind heart, and
then turned to a subject which is known to be of infallible interest to
all ladies. She spoke of her ailments.

Mrs. Meadowsweet beamed all over when this subject came on the
_tapis_. She even laid her fat hand on Mrs. Bertram's lap.

"Now, _did_ you ever try Eleazer Macjone's Pills of Life?" she
asked. "I always have a lot of them in the house; and I assure you, Mrs.
Bertram, they are worth all the doctor's messes put together; for years
I have taken the pills, and it's a positive fact that they're made to
fit the human body all round. Headaches--it's wonderful what Macjone's
pills do for headaches. If you have a low, all-overish feeling,
Macjone's pills pick you up directly. They are wonderful, too, for
colds; and if there's any infection going they nip it in the bud. I wish
you would try them, Mrs. Bertram; I know they'd pull you round, I'll
send for a box for you with pleasure when I'm having my next chest of
tea down from London. I always get my tea from London. I think what they
sell here is little better than dishwater; so I say to Beatrice, 'Bee,
my love, whatever happens, we'll get our tea from town."

"And your pills from town, too," responded Mrs. Bertram. "I think you
are a very wise woman, Mrs. Meadowsweet. How well your daughter plays
tennis. Yes, she is decidedly graceful. I have heard of many pills in my
day, and patent pills invariably fit one all round, but I have never yet
heard of Eleazer Macjone's Life Pills. You look very well, Mrs.
Meadowsweet, so I shall recommend them in future. For my part, I think
the less drugs one swallows the better."

"You are quite right, Mrs. Bertram, quite right. Except for the pills I
never touch medicine. And now I'd like to give you a wrinkle. I wouldn't
spend much money, if I were you, on Dr. Morris. He's all fads, poor man,
all fads. He speaks of the Life Pills as poison, and his terms--I have
over and over told his wife, Jessie Morris, that her husband's terms are
preposterous.