an to save your
life, for her hat, shirt-bosom, collar and tie are the real thing.
She has pockets in her skirt, one on each side, and, sometimes at
the club, she puts her hands in them and, with arms akimbo, admires
herself in the glass. At the club also she does other things to
show how independent she is. She slaps her friend on the back with
a 'Hello, Gertie. How's tricks?' and orders a glass of soda-lemonade
with a cherry in it. She wouldn't take a man's arm for the world,
which is perhaps fortunate, for she seldom gets a chance. But she
likes to talk to a man about the races and exhibit her knowledge of
baseball slang.

"A friend of mine has an elderly sister who is a mannish woman.
Contrary to the popular belief, she never borrows his neckties or
collars, but perhaps this may be accounted for by the fact that Fred
is rather stout in the neck and seldom wears a tie. She got him to tie
a four-in-hand for her one day. Fred used to be a sea-captain in his
early days and, although he could make all kinds of splices with a
rope, he had never tackled a four-in-hand. He was game, however, and,
after a hard tussle, accomplished what is known in nautical parlance
as a 'clove hitch.' Fred's sister wore it night and day for a week and
then cut it off with a pair of scissors.

"Fred had another experience some time after this which nearly proved
serious. His sister was on the reception committee for a club function
one evening and asked her brother's advice in regard to mixing punch.
Fred is an obliging fellow, so he got his friend, who is a barkeeper,
to mix up a couple of gallons and send it over to the clubhouse with
his compliments. The barkeeper thought it was for Fred's club so he
made it good and stiff. It was an innocuous looking mixture and tasted
innocent enough, so the club women said it was 'bully' and partook
freely.

"About twelve o'clock that night, somebody telephoned for Fred to come
quick. Just exactly what happened, Fred never would tell, but it cost
him about $40 for cab fares and an equal amount to keep it out of the
papers. Now, whenever one of the club women sees him, she crosses the
street.

"I don't believe there is any province in Heaven for the mannish
woman. If there is, I know lots of men who would enter upon a life of
crime rather than take a chance of going there when they die. I think
there is a special place in Hades, where the mannish woman will be
made to wear a mother-hubbard and let