ly falling asleep in
Jesus.--I have this morning felt depressed with the thought of being
closed up in the earth; surely this is from an enemy, for when death
has done its work, what matters where the body is? There is nothing
I desire so much as to live and die a Christian. I hold fast the hope
through Christ; yet I cannot perceive improvement, although I have at
times been much led out in prayer. Last night, while meditating on my
state, with earnest prayer for the direct witness of the renewal of my
nature, the assurance was given, 'I have graven thee on the palms of
my hands.' I want not to spend, but to _redeem_ the time with Mrs. D.
Called to see Mrs. T., who is very weak in body, but trusting in the
Lord. I knelt down to pray, and had not uttered many words before she
broke out in prayer and praise, expressive of her firm confidence in
the Lord Jesus. It was a melting season. It is encouraging to see the
power of grace thus manifested in the midst of pain and weakness, and
bearing up the subjects of it.--We met to make fresh arrangements
for the Clothing Society, when, much against my own will, I was
reappointed Treasurer: but, as it is a cross, I will try to take it
up.--Took tea with my daughter. All the preachers and their wives
were present. I was both pained and profited,--profited in singing
and prayer, and pained whilst endeavouring to defend an absent
brother.--Resigned my office in connexion with the sewing-meeting with
peace of mind. Yet, on reviewing the three years during which I have
held it, I can only say, unprofitable servant; for, although I have
endeavoured to please God in the faithful discharge of my duty, my
doings have been mixed with much imperfection. Called to see a young
woman in the small-pox, who is crying for mercy. I have visited her
several times. Her cry continues, mingled with the hope that God will
save her. I am sure gratitude ought continually to burn upon the altar
of my heart. Even when passing through darkness, light has sprang up
to illumine the path; but when I consider my returns, I am filled with
humiliation. What shall I do? I will try to do better; Lord, help me,
I am Thine."

I am Thine by purchase great,
Made, redeemed, sustained by Thee;
By surrender, now I wait
All Thy pleasure upon me.

"1845. Took tea with Mrs. W., and had the opportunity of urging her
husband to seek the salvation of his soul.--My dear Eliza was this
morning again made a mother.