l anxiety occasioned me
by the rivalry of Wilson, and his intolerable spirit of contradiction,
I could not bring myself to hate him altogether. We had, to be sure,
nearly every day a quarrel in which, yielding me publicly the palm of
victory, he, in some manner, contrived to make me feel that it was he
who had deserved it; yet a sense of pride on my part, and a veritable
dignity on his own, kept us always upon what are called "speaking
terms," while there were many points of strong congeniality in our
tempers, operating to awake me in a sentiment which our position alone,
perhaps, prevented from ripening into friendship. It is difficult,
indeed, to define, or even to describe, my real feelings towards
him. They formed a motley and heterogeneous admixture;--some petulant
animosity, which was not yet hatred, some esteem, more respect, much
fear, with a world of uneasy curiosity. To the moralist it will be
unnecessary to say, in addition, that Wilson and myself were the most
inseparable of companions.

It was no doubt the anomalous state of affairs existing between us,
which turned all my attacks upon him, (and they were many, either open
or covert) into the channel of banter or practical joke (giving pain
while assuming the aspect of mere fun) rather than into a more serious
and determined hostility. But my endeavours on this head were by no
means uniformly successful, even when my plans were the most wittily
concocted; for my namesake had much about him, in character, of that
unassuming and quiet austerity which, while enjoying the poignancy of
its own jokes, has no heel of Achilles in itself, and absolutely refuses
to be laughed at. I could find, indeed, but one vulnerable point,
and that, lying in a personal peculiarity, arising, perhaps, from
constitutional disease, would have been spared by any antagonist less
at his wit's end than myself;--my rival had a weakness in the faucal or
guttural organs, which precluded him from raising his voice at any time
above a very low whisper. Of this defect I did not fall to take what
poor advantage lay in my power.

Wilson's retaliations in kind were many; and there was one form of his
practical wit that disturbed me beyond measure. How his sagacity first
discovered at all that so petty a thing would vex me, is a question I
never could solve; but, having discovered, he habitually practised the
annoyance. I had always felt aversion to my uncourtly patronymic, and
its very common,