all men: not
to avenge ourselves, and we shall heap burning coals upon our adversary's
head." "For [3979]if you put up wrong" (as Chrysostom comments), "you get
the victory; he that loseth his money, loseth not the conquest in this our
philosophy." If he contend with thee, submit thyself unto him first, yield
to him. _Durum et durum non faciunt murum_, as the diverb is, two
refractory spirits will never agree, the only means to overcome is to
relent, _obsequio vinces_. Euclid in Plutarch, when his brother had angered
him, swore he would be revenged; but he gently replied, [3980]"Let me not
live if I do not make thee to love me again," upon which meek answer he was
pacified.

[3981] "Flectitur obsequio curvatus ab arbore ramus,
Frangis si vires experire tuas."

"A branch if easily bended yields to thee,
Pull hard it breaks: the difference you see."

The noble family of the Colonni in Rome, when they were expelled the city
by that furious Alexander the Sixth, gave the bending branch therefore as
an impress, with this motto, _Flecti potest, frangi non potest_, to signify
that he might break them by force, but so never make them stoop, for they
fled in the midst of their hard usage to the kingdom of Naples, and were
honourably entertained by Frederick the king, according to their callings.
Gentleness in this case might have done much more, and let thine adversary
be never so perverse, it may be by that means thou mayst win him; [3982]
_favore et benevolentia etiam immanis animus mansuescit_, soft words pacify
wrath, and the fiercest spirits are so soonest overcome; [3983]a generous
lion will not hurt a beast that lies prostrate, nor an elephant an
innocuous creature, but is _infestus infestis_, a terror and scourge alone
to such as are stubborn, and make resistance. It was the symbol of Emanuel
Philibert, Duke of Savoy, and he was not mistaken in it, for

[3984] "Quo quisque est major, magis est placabilis irae,
Et faciles motus mens generosa capit."

"A greater man is soonest pacified,
A noble spirit quickly satisfied."

It is reported by [3985]Gualter Mapes, an old historiographer of ours (who
lived 400 years since), that King Edward senior, and Llewellyn prince of
Wales, being at an interview near Aust upon Severn, in Gloucestershire, and
the prince sent for, refused to come to the king; he would needs go over to
him; which Llewellyn perceiving, [3986]"went up to the a