ess of death for the unborn child, faintness of heart
was made worse by the faintness of hunger. I sank into a kind of
slumber, more racking than the working hours. Then the harsh cries of
the crows aroused me. Daylight was again streaming through the window
bars. At a corner of the sill was a jar. The water in it was stale and
foul smelling. None other was to hand. A _mimitarai_ (hand basin) was
found in the closet. Thus was the nauseating ablution performed. Near
mid-day, when ready to cry out with hunger, for sake of child not self,
the door opened. It was O'Han who brought me food. One strip of
_takuan_, the bitter pickled radish; for drink, ice cold water. Such was
the meal. At night some pickled greens replaced the radish. On my knees
I plead with O'Han, besought her mercy for the unborn child. She laughed
at my misery. "Good living on forbidden fruits has made O'Shimo Dono
fat. Her big belly is perchance to be reduced by diet. Such are the
orders of the _okugata_. Han can do nothing; and would do nothing if she
could. What a fool! Cannot one please his lordship, all night and every
night, without promise of an heir to the House? Condescend the vacancy
and leave such matter to this Han...." Perhaps she felt that she had
said too much. Abruptly she turned and left the room.

I was not long alone. At least it seemed not so, for the light slumbers
were disturbed by the pangs of hunger. Then came a hand fingering the
outside bar. It was done stealthily. In aid or menace? A deadly fear
came over me. With wild staring eyes, loosened hair framing an anguished
and distorted figure I faced the object without, seeking its entrance.
The terror was not relieved by the appearance of the chamberlain,
Nishioka Shintaro[u]. His face was set and drawn, as of a man who has a
problem to work out, as of one who would carry out the purpose with
certainty and expedition. He closed the door, set the lamp carefully on
the floor in a distant corner. Not a word was spoken. Eyes bright with
terror I watched his movements. He carried something in one hand. Shaken
loose it was allowed to trail behind him. His preparations made he came
toward me with decision. Retreating before his advance the wall was
reached. By this time he was on me. Then I saw what it was he held; a
slender rope, its dreadful meaning plain. I screamed in terror. Roughly
he silenced me, one hand on open mouth. In stifled tones I plead for
mercy. Then failing sign of respite