's
fondest affections are not centred upon him, if he is not all you
can sanction and love, unite not your destiny with him. The life of
a contented, useful "old maid" is infinitely to be preferred to
that of a wretched, heart-broken wife. "Those unequal marriages
which are sometimes called _excellent matches_, seldom produce much
happiness. And where happiness is not, what _is_ all the rest?"

In accepting the addresses of young men, with a view to matrimony,
allow me to caution you against being too much influenced by good
looks and fascinating manners. It is due to young ladies to say,
that they show much more good sense in this respect than the other
sex. They do not select their companions so much on the ground of
mere personal beauty, without reference to higher and better
qualifications, as do young men. Still, a precaution to them on
this point will not be wholly useless.

Here is a young man who is gay in his manners, and fashionable in
his attire--a dandy of the first water, all buckled and strapped
after the latest pattern. His bosom is decked with golden chains,
and his fingers with platter rings. His tongue is as prolific of
lackadaisical words, as his head is devoid of good sense. He showers
the politest attentions in the assembly room, or during the ride, or
walk. He is, in fine, the very beau ideal of a "ladies' man!" There
is another young man. His manners are respectful, but without
courtly polish. His dress is plain and neat, with no display and no
gaudy ornaments. He knows nothing of the thousand ways and arts by
which the other makes himself so agreeable. He has no "small talk"
in his vocabulary, and must utter sound sense, on useful subjects,
or remain silent He may appear somewhat awkward in his attentions to
ladies, but is, nevertheless, friendly and obliging in his demeanor.
In his whole life and character, he is a retiring, but most worthy
youth. Are there not some young ladies who would prefer the company
of the showy, chattering fop; who would receive his address, yea,
accept him as a husband, and reject the diffident, modest youth? Yet
the latter would make a kind, affectionate, provident husband;
likely to attain to respectability, high-standing, and wealth:
while the former would most probably prove a poor, cross-grained
broken-stick; ill-natured, and perhaps dissipated; dragging wife and
family into the insignificance and poverty to which he speedily
would sink! Surely discreet young l