Then he treated to cigarettes, and we all went back to our game of penny
ante. NAP wouldn't join us. He said he'd just been playing a game with
crowns ante and he was busted. We'd hardly got the cards dealt, when
BILL turned to BISMARCK and asked, "I say, BIS, won't you run over and
telegraph to the old woman something about our FRITZ?"

"Let JENKINS go," said BIS.

Of course I assented to the proposition.

"Where the devil is FRITZ?" said BILL.

"Oh, he's been sleeping for the last two hours," said MOLTKE.

"Never mind," said BILL, "telegraph a victory by FRITZ."

So I telegraphed,

"A great victory has been won by our FRITZ. What great things have we
done for ourselves! We'll keep it up, old woman,

(Signed) BILL."

When I reached the tent everybody was asleep. NAP was reclining
gracefully on the breast of BISMARCK, as affectionately as if they were
brothers-in-law. The moon shone; the sky was skyey; the hills were
hilly; and all nature was getting up.

Anybody who says the above did not come over the cable lies, wickedly,
maliciously lies, with intent to deceive. As soon as JACK SMITH'S smack
sails, I'll send you a piece of the cable it came over.

* * * * *

[Illustration: Mr. Bull: The Sutler of the World]

* * * * *

HIRAM GREEN TO KONIG WILHELM

He Reviews the Career of a Lunatic. -- A Graduate with Nice Ideas.

KING WILYAM, Most noble Loonatic:

_We gates all der while!_ Accordin' to the Marine Cable, I understand
you've given old BONEY a _slosh on der cope mit der Sweitzer case;_ or
in good plain United States talk, LEWIS NAPOLEON has taken his Umpire,
and shoved it up the spout, without the benefit of Judge or Jewry.

I kinder had an idee that when the now busted up rooler of the Umpire
tackled you, that it would have been a ten dollar greenback in his
panterloons pocket if he had let the contract out on shares to his
nabors.

I've allers heard say that as able-bodied a Loonatic as the French say
you be, could handle any 3 ordinary men, "Be be Jost or Gobler damed,"
to cote from our friend BILLY SHAKESPEER.

We have had evidences here, of the superiority of Loonatics, mor'en
once.

If a man can prove that his upper story is crackt, he can wallop his
wife to his heart's content; and if anybody interferes, he can popp him
off with a six shooter, and the law will stand to his back.

Judges and Jewrys, when tryin' such a man