ise? You mean it?"
"If you wish it, yes. But I warn you I think it will not make it easier
for you when the time is over.
"Why two months?"
"Partly because I can afford no more. No! I know what you would say.
Partly because I can spare no more time. But I will give you that,
if you wish, though, honestly, I had very much rather not. I think it
unwise for you. I would protect you if I could--indeed I would!"
It was my turn to hesitate now. Every moment revealed to me some new
sweetness, some charm that I saw would weave itself into the very
fibre of my I had been! Was I not now a fool? Would it not being if the
opportunity were given. Oh, fool that be better to let her go before she
had become a part of my daily experience? I began to fear I was courting
my own shipwreck. She read my thoughts clearly.
"Indeed you would be wise to decide against it. Release me from my
promise. It was a mad scheme."
The superiority--or so I felt it--of her gentleness maddened me. It
might have been I who needed protection, who was running the risk of
misjudgment--not she, a lonely woman. She looked at me, waiting--trying
to be wise for me, never for one instant thinking of herself. I felt
utterly exiled from the real purpose of her life.
"I will never release you. I claim your promise. I hold to it."
"Very well then--I will write, and tell you where I shall be. Good-bye,
and if you change your mind, as I hope you will, tell me."
She extended her hand cool as a snowflake, and was gone, walking swiftly
up the road. Ah, let a man beware when his wishes fulfilled, rain down
upon him!
To what had I committed myself? She knew her strength and had no fears.
I could scarcely realize that she had liking enough for me to make the
offer. That it meant no shade more than she had said I knew well. She
was safe, but what was to be the result for me? I knew nothing--she was
a beloved mystery.
"Strange she is and secret, Strange her eyes; her cheeks are
cold as cold sea-shells."
Yet I would risk it, for I knew there was no hope if I let her go now,
and if I saw her again, some glimmer might fall upon my dark.
Next day this reached me:--Dear Mr. Clifden,--
I am going to some Indian friends for a time. On the 15th of June I
shall be at Srinagar in Kashmir. A friend has allowed me to take her
little houseboat, the "Kedarnath." If you like this plan we will share
the cost for two months. I warn you it is not luxurious, but I t
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