e have more than forty pounds of ready money in the
house for two bills,[14] which will not be payable for several weeks;
but we do not consider this money to be our own, and would rather suffer
great privation, God helping us, than take of it. We were looking to our
Father, and he has not suffered us to be disappointed. For when now we
had but threepence left, and only a small piece of bread, we received
two shillings and five shillings.
[Footnote 14: One bill I had to meet for a brother, the other was
for money which, in the form of a bill, I had sent to the
Continent; but in both cases the money was in my hands before the
bills were given.]
February 18. This afternoon I broke a bloodvessel in my stomach, and
lost a considerable quantity of blood. I was very happy immediately
afterwards. February 19. This morning, Lord's day, two brethren called
on me, to ask me what arrangement there should be made to-day, as it
regarded the four villages, where some of the brethren were in the habit
of preaching, as, on account of my not being able to preach, one of the
brethren would need to stay at home to take my place. I asked them,
kindly, to come again in about an hour, when I would give them an
answer. After they were gone, the Lord gave me faith to rise. I dressed
myself; and determined to go to the chapel. I was enabled to do so,
though so weak when I went, that walking the short distance to the
chapel was an exertion to me. I was enabled to preach this morning with
as loud and strong a voice as usual, and for the usual length of time.
After the morning meeting, a medical friend called on me, and entreated
me not to preach again in the afternoon, as it might greatly injure me.
I told him that I should indeed consider it great presumption to do so
had the Lord not given me faith. I preached again in the afternoon, and
this medical friend called again, and said the same concerning the
evening meeting. Nevertheless, having faith, I preached again in the
evening. After each meeting I became stronger, which was a plain proof
that the hand of God was in the matter.
February 20. The Lord enabled me to rise early in the morning, and to go
to our usual prayer meeting, where I read, spoke, and prayed. Afterwards
I wrote four letters, expounded the Scriptures at home, and attended the
meeting again in the evening. February 21. I attended the two meetings
as usual, preached in the evening, and did my other work besides.
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