atred towards me was rooted, and, even in
the grave, strove by his will to involve me in misfortune, as will
hereafter be seen.

I fled from Vienna, would to God it had been for ever; but fate by
strange ways, and unknown means, brought me back where Providence thought
proper I should become a vessel of wrath and persecution: I was to enact
my part in Europe, and not in Asia. At Nuremberg I met with a body of
Russians, commanded by General Lieuwen, my mother's relation, who were
marching to the Netherlands, and were the peace-makers of Europe. Major
Buschkow, whom I had known when Russian resident at Vienna, prevailed on
me to visit him, and presented me to the General. I pleased him, and may
say, with truth, he behaved to me like a friend and a father. He advised
me to enter into the Russian service, and gave me a company of dragoons,
in the regiment of Tobolski, on condition I should not leave him, but
employ myself in his cabinet: and his confidence and esteem for me were
unbounded.

Peace followed; the army returned to Moravia, without firing a musket,
and the head-quarters were fixed at Prosnitz.

In this town a public entertainment was given, by General Lieuwen, on the
coronation day of the Empress Elizabeth; and here an adventure happened
to me, which I shall ever remember, as a warning to myself, and insert as
a memento to others.

The army physician, on this day, kept a Faro bank for the entertainment
of the guests. My stock of money consisted of two and twenty ducats.
Thirst of gain, or perhaps example, induced me to venture two of these,
which I immediately lost, and very soon, by venturing again to regain
them, the whole two and twenty. Chagrined at my folly, I returned home:
I had nothing but a pair of pistols left, for which, because of their
workmanship, General Woyekow had offered me twenty ducats. These I took,
intending by their aid to attempt to retrieve my loss. Firing of guns
and pistols was heard throughout the town, because of the festival, and
I, in imitation of the rest, went to the window and fired mine. After a
few discharges, one of my pistols burst, and endangered my own hand, and
wounded my servant. I felt a momentary despondency, stronger than I ever
remember to have experienced before; insomuch that I was half induced,
with the remaining pistol, to shoot myself through the head. I however,
recovered my spirits, asked my servant what money he had, and received
from him three