noon and night. Why can't
you give it a rest?

_The G. E._ This is beyond endurance. But it has always been the same
from the time you cut your teeth until now--no filial piety, no
consideration for your mother and me; only a cross-grained selfishness
and bad temper. What happened in India?

_The C. P._ Oh, if you're going over that old story again, I'm off.

_The G. E._ _Donnerwetter noch einmal!_ Sit still, I tell you. I say
again, what happened in India? You never thought of ingratiating
yourself with the native chiefs. You couldn't even keep your engagements
or be punctual. All you thought of was running after some girl whose
face happened to take your fancy. I might as well have kept you at home
or sent you to London. What a creature to be a Crown Prince!

_The C. P. (wearily)._ There you go again. But I protest against such
treatment. I'd far rather be back before Verdun with old VON HAeSELER
grandmothering me all over the place.

_The G. E._ I wonder you dare to mention the word Verdun in my presence.

_The C. P._ Why shouldn't I? I didn't appoint myself Commander of the
Verdun armies. You did that, and I've done my best to obey your orders
and those of the High Command. If the French fight well, and if we lose
thousands upon thousands of men, how am I responsible? Do be reasonable,
my respected father. It was you who wanted Verdun. You won't be happy
till you get it, and if you do get it now it won't be as useful as an
old shoe without a sole. Anyhow, I'm bearing the burden, and if we
succeed in breaking through it's you that will have the credit of it. If
Verdun falls you'll be there in double quick time to take the salute in
your shining----

_The G. E._ Silence, jackanapes!

_The C. P._ And if we don't get through poor old VON HAeSELER will have
to retire. You'll send him your photograph in a gold frame to console
him, just as you consoled BISMARCK. Pity there's no BISMARCK now.
However, we can't have everything, can we?

(_Left quarrelling._)

* * * * *

"A damaged Zeppelin was observed to descend in the Thames
Estuary, and it surrendered on the approach of patrol goat."

_The Journal (Calcutta)._

This incident is believed to be unique, but German submarines have no
doubt before now been accounted for by our naval rams.

* * * * *

"We give these things long words. We talk of the 'triumph of
organisation.' I