of my collection, that
Johnson was once drawn to serve in the militia, the Trained Bands of the
City of London, and that Mr. Rackstrow, of the Museum in Fleet-street,
was his Colonel. It may be believed he did not serve in person; but the
idea, with all its circumstances, is certainly laughable. He upon that
occasion provided himself with a musket, and with a sword and belt,
which I have seen hanging in his closet.

He was very constant to those whom he once employed, if they gave him no
reason to be displeased. When somebody talked of being imposed on in the
purchase of tea and sugar, and such articles: 'That will not be the
case, (said he,) if you go to a _stately shop_, as I always do. In such
a shop it is not worth their while to take a petty advantage.'

An authour of most anxious and restless vanity being mentioned, 'Sir,
(said he,) there is not a young sapling upon Parnassus more severely
blown about by every wind of criticism than that poor fellow.'

The difference, he observed, between a well-bred and an ill-bred man is
this: 'One immediately attracts your liking, the other your aversion.
You love the one till you find reason to hate him; you hate the other
till you find reason to love him.'

The wife of one of his acquaintance had fraudulently made a purse for
herself out of her husband's fortune. Feeling a proper compunction in
her last moments, she confessed how much she had secreted; but before
she could tell where it was placed, she was seized with a convulsive fit
and expired. Her husband said, he was more hurt by her want of
confidence in him, than by the loss of his money. 'I told him, (said
Johnson,) that he should console himself: for _perhaps_ the money might
be _found_, and he was _sure_ that his wife was gone.'

A foppish physician once reminded Johnson of his having been in company
with him on a former occasion; 'I do not remember it, Sir.' The
physician still insisted; adding that he that day wore so fine a coat
that it must have attracted his notice. 'Sir, (said Johnson,) had you
been dipt in Pactolus[985] I should not have noticed you.'

He seemed to take a pleasure in speaking in his own style; for when he
had carelessly missed it, he would repeat the thought translated into
it[986]. Talking of the Comedy of _The Rehearsal_[987], he said, 'It has
not wit enough to keep it sweet.' This was easy; he therefore caught
himself, and pronounced a more round sentence; 'It has not vitality
enough