were a Romanist in the
presence of my priest, I think I should feel more at liberty to evade
confession than I do now. For both our sakes, I'll try to be as brief,
as simple, as lucid, as I can. And I'll trust you to understand, as well
as may be. Don't think there's any pose, any aim at effect, in what I'm
going to say. You've asked me a question, and I'm going to answer it,
that's all! I don't think, in my present frame of mind, I could bear to
have you entertain the suspicion that the answer was affected or lacking
in candor. _Allons!_ Already I'm growing too verbose!"

He looked up with a wan smile.

"Let's get down to facts. You ask me why I told my questioner that we no
longer knew each other. Well, then, let's have at it! It was because,
John Barclay, there is likely--no, there is sure--to come a time when
you won't care to acknowledge me as your friend. Oh, wait!" he added, as
the Lieutenant-Governor held up his hand in protest. "Hear me out. You
say I talked like an ass, that first night. Perhaps. But the fact
remains that I've been a drunkard--and that I'm bound to be one again!
I've been fighting against temptation for several weeks. It hasn't been
very strong, for some reason, and so I've managed to ground it so far.
But you remember the chap with whom old Hercules wrestled? Every time he
touched earth his strength was multiplied. Well, that's the way with
drink. I can throw the temptation for a while, but every time I do so it
rises, stronger many-fold. Sooner or later, I'm forced to give in. I
know it, as I know I'm sitting here. I'm doing my best now, because, in
the future, when the wrong that for a time you've righted goes wrong
again, I want you to remember that I made the effort--for you--and for
her--for the Fairy Princess. The end is as plain as day! It was born in
me, this. I think I've never told you that my father died of it, but
that's the truth. And the next time I drop, it will be for good and all.
I shall never make another effort to conquer the inevitable. If I can't
do it now, with the hope of redemption thus made plain, with a new
start, and a fresh chance, and--thanks to you, John--the past wiped off
the slate and a new sum set to solve, with the incentive of your
friendship and confidence, and the interest, so undeserved, of the Fairy
Princess, into the bargain,--if I can't do it now, I say, why surely I
can never do it. John, you can't know what I've been through. You,
who've never ha