KE

"What did you do to him?" asked Sam, quickly.

"Put an advertisement of pills on his back and some other ads. in his
text books," answered Tom. "Say, he looks some mad; doesn't he?"

"I should say yes," came from Stanley.

William Philander was approaching with long strides. In one hand he
held the poster Tom had fastened on his back, and he was shaking his
other fist wrathfully.

"Tom Rover, you've--er--insulted me!" he gasped as he came up. "You've
humiliated me before the whole class! I'll--I'll----" The dudish
student was so full of wrath he could not speak.

"Take a cough drop and clear your throat Billy," suggested Tom, coolly.
"Don't get so excited, you might drop dead from heart disease."

"How dare you put that--er--that advertisement of Gumley's Red Pills on
my back?" stormed the stylishly-dressed one.

"'Gumley's Red Pills for Red-Blooded People,'" quoted Spud, from the
poster. "Say, they are fine, Willie. Didn't you ever take 'em?"

"No, and I don't want to. I want Tom Ro----"

"Say, if you haven't taken any of Gumley's pills you don't know what
you've missed," went on Spud, with a wink at the others. "Why, there
was a man over in Rottenberg who was flat on his back with half a dozen
fatal diseases. The doctors gave him just three days to live,--three
days, think of it! His wife nearly cried her eyes out. Then along
came this Gumley man with a trunk full of his Red Pills for Red-Blooded
People. He didn't exactly know if the dying man was red-blooded or
not, but he took a chance and gave the fellow sixteen pills, four after
breakfast, four after dinner, four after supper and four on retiring,
and the next day, what do you think happened? That man got up and went
to work, and he's been at his Job ever since."

"Yes, and not only that," added Tom, earnestly. "That man organized a
tug-of-war team,--the plumbers against the Local Conclave of the R. W.
Q. Society,--and they've had three tug-of-war matches, and he has
pulled the R. W. Q. Society over the line every time. Talk about pills
that are worth their weight in gold! Why, Gumley's Red Pills for
Red-Blooded People are worth their weight in diamonds, and you ought to
get down on your bended knees and thank somebody for having been given
the opportunity to advertise them."

"Oh, you make me--er--tired, don't you know," gasped William Philander.
"It was a--er--a horrid trick. All the class were laughing at me. And
when I open