with a radiant smile, replied, "Oh, Mr. --er and
I had a scrumptious time on the lake. We were sailors--just sailors--and
did all sorts of lovely things, didn't we, Mr. --er?"

I agreed, and Betty went on to her peroration:

"And at the very end Mr. --er was a tiger and I was a little small boy, and
he jumped on me out of the bushes and knocked me down in the mud" [O Betty!
O unjust sailor!], "and Miss Watt came in as I was changing my things. It
_was_ splendid, wasn't it--Reggie?"

_Per ardua ad astra._ I had won my promotion to the commissioned ranks of
the Christian names.

* * * * *

WIMMIN.

Behind wi' the sowin',
An' rent-day to meet,
For first time o' knowin'
John Buckham was beat;
Torpedoed an' swimmin'
An' fairly done in,
When someone said, "Wimmin
Would suit ye at Lynn."

Dal Midwood, at Mutcham,
Who runs by old rules,
Said, "John, don't 'ee touch em--
A pa'sel o' fules
Aye dabbin' an' trimmin'
Wi' powder an' pin;
No, don't 'ee have wimmin,
John Buckham, at Lynn."

Well, back wi' the sowin',
An' rent-day to meet,
I had to get goin'
Or own I were beat.
The banks needed trimmin';
The roots wasn't in;
'Twas either take wimmin
Or walk out o' Lynn.

They came. They was pretty
An' white o' the hand,
But good-heart an' gritty
An' chockful o' sand;
Wi' energy brimmin'
Right up to the chin--
An' that sort o' wimmin
Was welcome at Lynn.

At ploughin' they're able,
Or drainin' a fen,
They'll muck out a stable
As well as the men.
Their praises I'm hymnin',
For where would ha' bin,
If it weren't for the wimmin,
John Buckham, at Lynn?

W.H.O.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Mrs Green. to Mrs. Jones_ (_who is gazing at an
aeroplane_). "MY WORD! I SHOULDN'T CARE FOR ONE OF _THEM_ FLYING THINGS TO
SETTLE ON ME."]

* * * * *

"The Cairo Governorate has engaged white-washers to whiten plate-forms
of points from which streets branch which will be compelled by the end
of next week, before the commencement of the gaz lanterns decrease take
place."--_Egyptian Gazette._

The Sphinx has been requested to furnish an explanation.

* * * * *

OUR INDOMITABLES.

"THE ENGLISH GIRL.

"STANDING IN WITNESS-BOX WITHOUT A QUIVER.

"Rose -