ain't any good my lookin', my dear, for I wasn't raised to
these sort of things, and I'm darned if I know where to find it."

A groan from Mrs. Jake, followed by: "Wall, I reckon when I find
myself again in No. 9, Mount Mascal Street, I won't want to go
travelling around even to cut out Keren-Happuch Jones."

I came to the rescue at this point, and showed the good lady where
Heidelberg lay. She was a hard-featured, plain woman of some
thirty-eight summers, her hair was dragged back uncompromisingly from
her forehead, and there were no "adulteries of art" about either
coiffure or costume.

"You see," she said apologetically, "Jake here and me are travelling
around, and the only way we can get on is to ask for a ticket to a
place, and never stop travelling till we get there. We speak German
all right because my parents were Germans, and Jake was born in
Germany; but he don't know much about it because he was only two years
old when he left it eight-and-thirty years ago. We thought we'd like
to see the Paris Exposition, but my! it ain't to be compared to the
Chicago Exhibition, and as for Paris, it can't come up to Noo York,
and these river steamers ain't a patch on the Hudson River boats, and
I don't think much of Europe anyway."

Jake, a good-looking, gentle-mannered man, tried to soften the
asperity of his wife's strictures without success. He evidently adored
her.

"The way we travel," resumed Mrs. Jake, "is to think of a place we've
heard of, and to ask for a ticket to it. Now, we'd heard of Paris and
Cologne, and Heidelberg, and Baden, and Dresden, and Berlin, and
Hamburg, but we don't know now how they come--see? So we hev' to go
cavortin' around to find out which to take next. A gentleman way back
at Cologne"--she pronounced it "Klon"--"told me Heidelberg came next.
I quite thought Baden was near Hamburg, and that we should take it
last; but they tell me it ain't, and that, you see, has upset all our
calculations. Guess you're a Londoner, anyway; thought so by your
accent!"

When we left the steamer at Bingen, the last I heard of Mrs. Jake was
a plaintive moan:

"Guess I don't think much of Europe, anyway, and I wouldn't come
again, not even to cut out Keren-Happuch!"

OF SOME FELLOW TRAVELLERS AND THE CATHEDRAL OF MAINZ.

"Ja Wohl! Frau Rittergutsbesitzer. I have lived in the Herr
Professor's house for five-and-thirty years. I have pickled his
cabbage and preserved his fruit. I have m