rol, produced a constant war of words between us; and if I
appealed to my uncle, I was sure to get the worst of it. He did not
exactly encourage his son in this ungenerous line of conduct, but his
great maxim was to _divide and rule_; to exact from all who were
dependent upon him, the most uncompromising obedience to his arbitrary
will; and he laughed at my remonstrances, and turned my indignation
into ridicule.

I was daily reminded, particularly before strangers, of the domestic
calamities which had made me dependent upon his cold, extorted charity;
while I was reproached with my want of gratitude to a cruel master.

Passion and wounded pride drew from me burning tears. I felt that I was
growing fierce and hard like my persecutors, and my conscience, yet
tender, deplored the lamentable change. My heart, crushed beneath the
sense of injustice and unmerited neglect, was closed against the best
feelings of humanity, and I regarded my fellow men with aversion and
mistrust.

These bitter and desponding feelings deprived my nights of rest--my
days, of hope. When the morning came and I took my stand at the
accursed desk, I wished the day gone; and when night released me from
the abhorrent task, and I sought my humble garret, I sat for hours at
the open window, brooding over my wrongs.

The moonbeams glittered in the tears that anguish wrung from my
upturned eyes. The stars seemed to look down upon me with compassionate
earnestness. Sometimes my young spirit, carried away by the intense
love I felt for those beautiful eyes of heaven, forgot for awhile the
sorrows and cares of life and soared far, far away to seek for sympathy
and affection in those unknown regions of light and purity.

I had few opportunities of religious instruction in this truly Godless
household. My uncle never attended church when he could avoid the
obligation, and then, only to keep up appearances--a religion of the
world; in which the heart had no part. There was always a Bible in the
office, but it was never used but in the way of business to administer
oaths. Whenever I had a moment's leisure I had turned over the pages
with eager and mysterious curiosity, but the knowledge that should have
brought peace and comfort, and reconciled me to my dreary lot, not
being sought for in the right spirit, added to my present despondency,
the dread of future punishment.

Oh, that awful fear of Hell. How it darkened with its unholy shadow,
all that was brigh