" argued Mrs. Barker.

Barker sniffed.

"Have it your own way," he said. "It's no treat to _me_ to see his
eyes flash, and if he'd put that stern mouth of his to some better use
than advising the guv'nor to lock up the cigars and trouser the key,
I'd be better pleased. If there's one thing I can't stand," said
Barker, "it's not to be trusted!" He lifted his cigar and looked at it
censoriously. "I thought so! Burning all down one side. They will do
that if you light 'em careless. Oh, well," he continued, rising and
going to the humidor, "there's plenty more where that came from. Out
of evil cometh good," said Barker philosophically. "If the guv'nor
hadn't been in such a overwrought state to-night, he'd have remembered
not to leave the key in the keyhole. Help yourself to another glass of
port, Ellen, and let's enjoy ourselves!"

II

When one considers how full of his own troubles, how weighed down with
the problems of his own existence the average playgoer generally is
when enters a theatre, it is remarkable that dramatists ever find it
possible to divert and entertain whole audiences for a space of
several hours. As regards at least three of those who had assembled to
witness its opening performance, the author of "Tried by Fire," at the
Leicester Theatre, undoubtedly had his work cut out for him.

It has perhaps been sufficiently indicated by the remarks of Barker,
the valet, that the little dinner at Freddie Rooke's had not been an
unqualified success. Searching the records for an adequately gloomy
parallel to the taxi-cab journey to the theatre which followed it, one
can only think of Napoleon's retreat from Moscow. And yet even that
was probably not conducted in dead silence.

The only member of the party who was even remotely happy was,
curiously enough, Freddie Rooke. Originally Freddie had obtained three
tickets for "Tried by Fire." The unexpected arrival of Lady Underhill
had obliged him to buy a fourth, separated by several rows from the
other three. This, as he had told Derek at breakfast, was the seat he
proposed to occupy himself.

It consoles the philosopher in this hard world to reflect that, even
if man is born to sorrow as the sparks fly upward, it is still
possible for small things to make him happy. The thought of being
several rows away from Lady Underhill had restored Freddie's
equanimity like a tonic. It thrilled him like the strains of some
grand, sweet anthem all the way to the theatre.