could sit by the window for hours and
look at the chickens running back and forth, picking up crumbs, and
watching the strutting cock.

I must have been like a little child that, for the first time, begins
to take notice of the objects that surround it.

I seemed as if awaking from darkness, as if dreaming with my eyes
open. Everything seemed new and strangely mysterious to me, although I
had nearly attained my seventieth year.

When, after many weeks, I again saw my face in the mirror, I was
surprised at the saddened, sunken features of the old man. Could that
be I!

I had gone to the neighboring village to order a gravestone. On my way
home, night overtook me. Suddenly a storm burst upon the valley. Like a
child, I counted the interval between the lightning and the thunder. At
first I could count up to thirty-two, afterwards only to seven; and
then I stopped counting. I saw the houses by the roadside, and knew who
lived in them here and there, I might have found shelter, but what
should I do in a strange house, wet to the skin as I was? I kept in the
middle of the road, on the broken stone. When I came to where the
little bridge was, I had to wade through the water.

I noticed that I was in the midst of the storm-cloud. How glorious it
would have been to die at that moment--to be struck dead by lightning!

"But my children, my children!" I uttered the words in a loud voice,
but the thunder drowned my cries.

The flashes of lightning succeeded each other so rapidly that they
blinded me; I could see nothing more. I closed my eyes and held fast to
a rock by the wayside. I had never heard such fearful roaring of the
thunder, or seen such uninterrupted flashes of lightning. I stood still
and concluded to wait there, while I thought of the many other beings
who were also exposed to this storm; and at last, I could weep. I had
not wept since her death, and now it did me good. The hail beat into my
face, already wet with tears.

Suddenly Rothfuss appears and exclaims: "Martella sends me. Oh, God be
praised! there is a good bed waiting for you at home."

Guided by Rothfuss, I reached the house. Although my family were
greatly concerned as to the effect it might have, the shock that I had
undergone had really benefited me. I slept until noon, and when I arose
I felt as if breathing a new life.

I must stop here. I cannot go on. I was obliged to learn how to begin
life anew. When one has buried his dearest love in t