WAITER, all at table standing up, glasses in hand
convivially_).

Viva, viva Rataplan!
Oh! Rataplan Penelope Anne!
Oh! Rataplan Penelope-elope
Anne, Anne, Anne!

Tableau.--_BOUNCER on chair, with dish-cover and carving-knife.
WAITER at side, waving napkin. PENELOPE between COX and BOX in
centre._

_Curtain descends._

[Illustration: "AUTHOR! AUTHOR!"]

CHAPTER XXIII.

AFTER THE PERFORMANCE, CONVERSATION COMMENCES.

"Your wife played charmingly, Mr. Frimmely."

Mr. Frimmely smiles, and tries to look as if the merit of her acting was
due entirely to his instruction.

_Madame Regniati._ I don't suppose you chose her dress for her.

_Mr. Orby Frimmely_ (_still as if he HAD done so, but allowed her the
credit of it_). No, no; Mrs. Frimmely has a great taste for theatricals.

_Miss Adelaide Cherton_ (_to Miss Medford_). Oh, I am sure we ought to
be so much obliged to you for playing.

_Miss Ada._ Oh, it was so good. I really wonder how you could manage to
accompany them as you did.

_Miss Medford_ (_quite unaffectedly_). I am so glad I was able to do it,
as I've only been accustomed to play to my brother's singing, that is
when he doesn't do it himself.

_The Signor_ (_delighted_). Oh, my Jo! I 'ave not laugh so much for a
long time.

_Milburd_ (_who has put on evening dress and joined us, is evidently
immensely pleased_.) No! (_Diffidently._) It seemed to go very well.

_Mrs. Frampton_ (_a middle-aged lady, coming up to him_). I really
_must_ congratulate you, Mr. Milburd. I'm a great play-goer, and I
haven't seen anything at any one of the London theatres equal to it. You
really ought to produce it in Town.

_Milburd_ (_foreseeing an extinguisher over Shakespeare_). Do you think
it good enough?

_Mrs. Frampton._ Good enough!--why--I was only saying to my
daughter--(Julia--Mr. Milburd (_introduction_))--wasn't I, Julia?

_Julia_ (_rather stupidly, but still exhibiting caution_). What, mamma?

_Mrs. Frampton._ Why about Mr. Milburd's capital little farce.

_Julia_ (_easily taking up her cue_). Oh, yes! (_ecstatically._) I was
_so_ delighted--and where _did_ you get that wonderful dress?

_Milburd_ (_carelessly_). Oh, I got it at the costumier's. I had it for
another part some time ago.

_Jovial Stout Gentleman_ (_refreshing himself, and seeing Captain
Byrton_). Hallo! Old Bouncer. By Jove! Ca