to prest on the one
side by the pittifull papers, pasted on euery poast, of that which was
neither so nor so, and on the other side vrg'd thereto in duety to
expresse with thankefulnes the kind entertainment I found.

Your honors poore seruant,
W. K.

Kemps humble request to the impudent generation of Ballad-makers
and their coherents; that it would please their rascalities to
pitty his paines in the great iourney he pretends{20:3}, and not
fill the country with lyes of his neuer done actes, as they did in
his late Morrice to Norwich.

To the tune of Thomas Delonies Epitaph.

My notable Shakerags, the effect of my sute is discouered in the Title
of my supplication; but for your better vnderstandings, for that I know
you to be a sort{20:9} of witles beetle-heads that can understand
nothing but what is knockt into your scalpes, These are by these
presentes to certifie vnto your block-headships, that I, William Kemp,
whom you had neer hand rent in sunder with your vnreasonable rimes, am
shortly, God willing, to set forward as merily as I may; whether I my
selfe know not. Wherefore, by the way, I would wish ye, imploy not your
little wits in certifying the world that I am gone to Rome, Jerusalem,
Venice, or any other place at your idle appoint. I knowe the best of ye,
by the lyes ye writ of me, got not the price of a good hat to couer your
brainles heads: if any of ye had come to me, my bounty should haue
exceeded the best of your good masters the Ballad-buiers, I wold haue
apparrelled your dry pates in party coloured bonnets, and bestowd a
leash of my cast belles to haue crown'd ye with cox-combs. I haue made a
priuie search what priuate Jigmonger{20:24} of your jolly number hath
been the Author of these abhominable ballets written of me. I was told
it was the great ballet-maker T. D., alias Tho. Deloney, Chronicler of
the memorable liues of the 6. yeomen of the west, Jack of Newbery, the
Gentle-craft{20:26}, and such like honest men, omitted by Stow,
Hollinshead, Grafton, Hal, froysart, and the rest of those wel
deseruing writers; but I was giuen since to vnderstand your late
generall Tho. dyed poorely, as ye all must do, and was honestly buried,
which is much to bee doubted of some of you. The quest of inquiry
finding him by death acquited of the Inditement, I was let to wit y^t
another Lord of litle wit, one whose imployment for the Pageant was
vtterly spent, he being knowne to be Elde