was, `_Blastus unholy_.'"

"Oh, Phil, how _can_ you!" exclaimed Mrs Maylands, with a shocked look.

"Well, mother, what's wrong in that?"

"You know very well, Phil, that `Blast us' is not in the Bible at all,
and that it is a very awful species of slang swearing."

"So the telegraph clerk thought," returned Phil, "but when my City
friend pointed out that Blastus was `the king's chamberlain' they were
obliged to let the telegram go. `_Blastus_' stands for `_superior
quality_,' and `_unholy_' for `_Offer is open for three days from time
of despatch of telegram_.' Using the same code, if a merchant wants to
ask a Calcutta friend the question--`_How is the coming crop as regards
extent and appearance_?' he merely telegraphs the word `_Hamlet_.' If
he wishes to say `_Bills of lading go forward by this mail, Invoices
will follow_,' he has only to telegraph `_Heretic_.' For the most part,
the compilers of these codes seem to have used the words arbitrarily,
for the word `_Ellwood_' has no visible connection with the words `_Blue
Velvet_,' which it represents; neither is there connection between
`_Doves_' and `_French Brandy_,' nor between `_Collapse_' and `_Scotch
Coals_,' though there does seem to have been a gleam of significance
when they fixed on `_Downward_' to represent `_Irish Whisky_.'"

"That's true, Phil, there was a touch of sense there, if not sarcasm,"
said the widow heartily, for she was an abhorrer of strong drink!

"Then, mother, think of the saving of time accomplished by the
telegraph. In days not long past, if a merchant in India wished to
transact business with another in New York he had to write a letter
which took months to make the voyage out, and his correspondent had to
write a reply which took about the same time to return. Now, not long
ago the head of an Indian house wanted a ship-load of something (I
forget what) from New York. He telegraphed a few unconnected words to
my City friend in London. If there had been no obstruction of any kind
the message could have been flashed from Bombay to London in a few
seconds; as it was, it made the journey in three hours. My friend, who
received it in the forenoon, telegraphed to New York, transacted the
business, received a reply from New York, and telegraphed back to Bombay
that the order was given and in process of execution before five p.m. on
the same day. Thus a commercial transaction between India and America,
_via_ England, involving, pe