ly, and he
wuz jest as crazy as a loon for the time bein'. And he hollered the
first thing that "he wanted some of Hall's salve." And I told him "there
wuzn't a mite in the house."

And he hollered up and says, "There would be some if there wuz any sense
in the head of the house."

[Illustration: "HE WANTED SOME OF HALL'S SALVE."]

I glanced up mechanically at his bald head, but didn't say nothin', for
I see it wouldn't do. And he hollered out agin, "Why hain't there any
Hall's salve?" Sez I, "Because old Hall has been dead for years and
years, and hain't made any salve."

"Wall, he wouldn't have been dead if he had had any care took of him,"
he yelled out.

"Why," sez I, "he wuz killed by lightnin'; struck down entirely
onexpected five years ago last summer."

"Oh, argue and dispute with a dying man. Gracious Peter! what will
become of me!" he groaned out, a-holdin' his foot in his hand.

Sez I, "Let me put some Pond's Extract on it, Josiah."

"Pond's Extract!" he yelled, and then he called that good remedy words I
wuz ashamed to hear him utter.

And he jumped round and pranced and kicked just as it is the nater of
man to act under bodily injury of that sort. And then he ordered me to
take a pin and get the thorn out, and then acted mad as a hen at me
all the time I wuz a-doin' it; acted jest as if I wuz a-prickin' him
a-purpose.

He talked voyalent and mad. I tried to hush him down; I told him the
author of "Wedlock's Peaceful Repose" would hear him, and he hollered
back "he didn't care a cent who heard him. He wuz killed, and he
shouldn't live to trouble anybody long if that pain kept up."

His acts and words wuz exceedingly skairful to anybody who didn't
understand the nater of a man. But I wuzn't moved by 'em so much as the
width of a horse hair. Good land! I knew that jest as soon as the pain
subsided he would be good as gold, so I kep' on, cool and collected, and
got the thorn out, and did up the suffering toe in Pond's Extract, and I
hadn't only jest got it done, when, for all the world! if I didn't see a
double team stop in front of the house, and I peeked through the winder
and see as it wuz the livery stable man from Jonesville, and he had
brung down the last straws to be lifted onto the camel's back--a hull
lot of onexpected company. A hull load of 'em.

There wuz the Baptist minister and his wife and their three children,
and the minister's wife's sister-in-law from the West, who wuz there