they don't come together in my house when I'm upstairs--that I promise
you! And so I told my sister Warrington."

"Am I to understand," says the General, "that you have done my Lady
Warrington the favour to warn her against her sister, my daughter Miss
Hester?"

"Yes, pa, of course I have. A duty is a duty, and a woman is a woman,
and a man's a man, as I know very well. Don't tell me! He is a man.
Every man is a man, with all his sanctified airs!"

"You yourself have a married sister, with whom you were staying when my
son Jack first had the happiness of making your acquaintance?" remarks
the General.

"Yes, of course I have a married sister; every one knows that and I have
been as good as a mother to her children, that I have!"

"And am I to gather from your conversation that your attractions proved
a powerful temptation for your sister's husband?"

"Law, General! I don't know how you can go for to say I ever said any
such a thing!" cries Mrs. Jack, red and voluble.

"Don't you perceive, my dear madam, that it is you who have insinuated
as much, not only regarding yourself, but regarding my own two
daughters?"

"Never, never, never, as I'm a Christian woman! And it's most cruel of
you to say so, sir. And I do say a sister is best out of the house, that
I do! And as Theo's time is coming, I warn her, that's all."

"Have you discovered, my good madam, whether my poor Hetty has stolen
any of the spoons? When I came to breakfast this morning, my daughter
was alone, and there must have been a score of pieces of silver on the
table."

"Law, sir! who ever said a word about spoons? Did I ever accuse the poor
dear? If I did, may I drop down dead at this moment on this hearth-rug!
And I ain't used to be spoke to in this way. And me and Jack have both
remarked it; and I've done my duty, that I have." And here Mrs. Jack
flounces out of the room, in tears.

"And has the woman had the impudence to tell you this, my child?"
asks the General, when Theo (who is a little delicate) comes to the
tea-table.

"She has told me every day since she has been here. She comes into my
dressing-room to tell me. She comes to my nursery, and says, 'Ah, I
wouldn't have a sister prowling about my nursery, that I wouldn't.' Ah,
how pleasant it is to have amiable and well-bred relatives, say I."

"Thy poor mother has been spared this woman," groans the General.

"Our mother would have made her better, papa," says Theo, kissing him.