FREE BOOKS

Author's List




PREV.   NEXT  
|<   1205   1206   1207   1208   1209   1210   1211   1212   1213   1214   1215   1216   1217   1218   1219   1220   1221   1222   1223   1224   1225   1226   1227   1228   1229  
1230   1231   1232   1233   1234   1235   1236   1237   1238   1239   1240   1241   1242   1243   1244   1245   1246   1247   1248   1249   1250   1251   1252   1253   1254   >>   >|  
get up and walk away, Gyp nodded. The little dancer placed the sweet in her mouth, and said complacently: "Of course he has; because he married you." Then, seeming to grow conscious of Winton's eyes fixed so intently on her, she became confused, swallowed hastily, and said: "Oh, isn't it lovely here--like the country! I'm afraid I must go; it's my practice-time. It's so important for me not to miss any now, isn't it?" And she rose. Winton got up, too. Gyp saw the girl's eyes, lighting on his rigid hand, grow round and rounder; and from her, walking past the side of the house, the careful voice floated back: "Oh, I do hope--" But what, could not be heard. Sinking back in her chair, Gyp sat motionless. Bees were murmurous among her flowers, pigeons murmurous among the trees; the sunlight warmed her knees, and her stretched-out feet through the openwork of her stockings. The maid's laughter, the delicious growling of the puppies at play in the kitchen came drifting down the garden, with the distant cry of a milkman up the road. All was very peaceful. But in her heart were such curious, baffled emotions, such strange, tangled feelings. This moment of enlightenment regarding the measure of her husband's frankness came close on the heels of the moment fate had chosen for another revelation, for clinching within her a fear felt for weeks past. She had said to Winton that she did not want to have a child. In those conscious that their birth has caused death or even too great suffering, there is sometimes this hostile instinct. She had not even the consolation that Fiorsen wanted children; she knew that he did not. And now she was sure one was coming. But it was more than that. She had not reached, and knew she could not reach, that point of spirit-union which alone makes marriage sacred, and the sacrifices demanded by motherhood a joy. She was fairly caught in the web of her foolish and presumptuous mistake! So few months of marriage--and so sure that it was a failure, so hopeless for the future! In the light of this new certainty, it was terrifying. A hard, natural fact is needed to bring a yearning and bewildered spirit to knowledge of the truth. Disillusionment is not welcome to a woman's heart; the less welcome when it is disillusionment with self as much as with another. Her great dedication--her scheme of life! She had been going to--what?--save Fiorsen from himself! It was laughable. Sh
PREV.   NEXT  
|<   1205   1206   1207   1208   1209   1210   1211   1212   1213   1214   1215   1216   1217   1218   1219   1220   1221   1222   1223   1224   1225   1226   1227   1228   1229  
1230   1231   1232   1233   1234   1235   1236   1237   1238   1239   1240   1241   1242   1243   1244   1245   1246   1247   1248   1249   1250   1251   1252   1253   1254   >>   >|  



Top keywords:
Winton
 

marriage

 
Fiorsen
 

moment

 

conscious

 
spirit
 
murmurous
 

instinct

 
children
 

hostile


coming
 
wanted
 

consolation

 

chosen

 

revelation

 

clinching

 

reached

 

suffering

 
caused
 

caught


knowledge
 

Disillusionment

 

bewildered

 

yearning

 

natural

 

needed

 

disillusionment

 

laughable

 

dedication

 

scheme


terrifying

 
demanded
 
motherhood
 

fairly

 

sacrifices

 

sacred

 

frankness

 

future

 

hopeless

 

certainty


failure

 

months

 

presumptuous

 
foolish
 
mistake
 
garden
 

important

 

practice

 

country

 

afraid