he jewels are your own already. I have stolen them out of
her bureau, and she does not know it. Fly to your spark, he'll tell
you more of the matter. Leave me to manage her.

MISS NEVILLE. My dear cousin!

TONY. Vanish. She's here, and has missed them already. [Exit MISS
NEVILLE.] Zounds! how she fidgets and spits about like a Catherine
wheel.

Enter MRS. HARDCASTLE.

MRS. HARDCASTLE. Confusion! thieves! robbers! we are cheated,
plundered, broke open, undone.

TONY. What's the matter, what's the matter, mamma? I hope nothing has
happened to any of the good family!

MRS. HARDCASTLE. We are robbed. My bureau has been broken open, the
jewels taken out, and I'm undone.

TONY. Oh! is that all? Ha! ha! ha! By the laws, I never saw it
acted better in my life. Ecod, I thought you was ruined in earnest,
ha! ha! ha!

MRS. HARDCASTLE. Why, boy, I AM ruined in earnest. My bureau has been
broken open, and all taken away.

TONY. Stick to that: ha! ha! ha! stick to that. I'll bear witness,
you know; call me to bear witness.

MRS. HARDCASTLE. I tell you, Tony, by all that's precious, the jewels
are gone, and I shall be ruined for ever.

TONY. Sure I know they're gone, and I'm to say so.

MRS. HARDCASTLE. My dearest Tony, but hear me. They're gone, I say.

TONY. By the laws, mamma, you make me for to laugh, ha! ha! I know
who took them well enough, ha! ha! ha!

MRS. HARDCASTLE. Was there ever such a blockhead, that can't tell the
difference between jest and earnest? I tell you I'm not in jest,
booby.

TONY. That's right, that's right; you must be in a bitter passion, and
then nobody will suspect either of us. I'll bear witness that they are
gone.

MRS. HARDCASTLE. Was there ever such a cross-grained brute, that
won't hear me? Can you bear witness that you're no better than a
fool? Was ever poor woman so beset with fools on one hand, and
thieves on the other?

TONY. I can bear witness to that.

MRS. HARDCASTLE. Bear witness again, you blockhead you, and I'll turn
you out of the room directly. My poor niece, what will become of her?
Do you laugh, you unfeeling brute, as if you enjoyed my distress?

TONY. I can bear witness to that.

MRS. HARDCASTLE. Do you insult me, monster? I'll teach you to vex
your mother, I will.

TONY. I can bear witness to that. [He runs off, she follows him.]

Enter Miss HARDCASTLE and Maid.

MISS HARDCASTLE. What an unaccountable cr