y sho I kin, honey. What you reckon I been doin' all deze
long-come-shorts ef I dunner how ter spell? How you speck I kin git
'long, haulin' an' maulin', ef I dunner how ter spell? Why, I could
spell long 'fo' I know'd my own name."

"Long-come-shorts, what are they?" asked Nan.

"Rainy days an' windy nights," responded Uncle Plato, throwing his head
back, and closing his eyes.

"Let's hear you spell, then," said Nan.

"Dee-o-egg, dog," was the prompt response. Nan looked at Uncle Plato to
see if he was joking, but he was solemnity itself. "E-double-egg, egg!"
he continued.

"Now spell John A. Murrell," said Nan. Murrell, the land pirate, was one
of her favourite heroes at this time.

Uncle Plato pretended to be very much shocked. "Why, honey, dat man wuz
rank pizen. En spozen he wa'nt, how you speck me ter spell sump'n er
somebody which I ain't never laid eyes on? How I gwineter spell Johnny
Murrell, an' him done dead dis many a long year ago?"

"Well, spell goose, then," said Nan, seeing a flock of geese marching
stiffly in single file across a field near the road.

Uncle Plato looked at them carefully enough to take their measure, and
then shook his head solemnly. "Deyer so many un um, honey, dey'd be
monstus hard fer ter spell."

"Well, just spell one of them then," Nan suggested.

"Which un, honey?"

"Any one you choose."

Uncle Plato studied over the matter a moment, and again shook his head.
"Uh-uh, honey; dat ain't nigh gwine ter do. Ef you speck me fer ter
spell goose, you got ter pick out de one you want me ter spell."

"Well, spell the one behind all the rest."

Again Uncle Plato shook his head. "Dat ar goose got half-grown goslin's,
an' I ain't never larnt how ter spell goose wid half-grown goslin's. You
ax too much, honey."

"Then spell the one next to head." Nan was inexorable.

"Dat ar ain't no goose," replied Uncle Plato, with an air of triumph;
"she's a gander."

"I don't believe you know how to spell goose," said Nan, with something
like scorn.

"Don't you fool yo'se'f, honey," remarked Uncle Plato in a tone of
confidence. "You git me a great big fat un, not too ol', an' not too
young, an' fill 'er full er stuffin', an' bake 'er brown in de big oven,
an' save all de drippin's, an' put 'er on de table not fur fum whar I
mought be settin' at, an' gi' me a pone er corn bread, an' don't have no
talkin' an' laughin' in de game--an' ef I don't spell dat goose, I'll
come mighty nigh it